Do you have a favorite Jack Handey "Deep Thought"?

“Anytime I see something screech across a room and latch onto someones neck, and the guy screams and tries to get it off, I have to laugh, because what is that thing.”

What a coincidence. I was stumbling yesterday and came across this page.

I think my favorite is,
“Think about world peace; while you’re doing that I’ll be over here stealing your stuff.” XD

I hadn’t heard of Jack Handey but I have now. I always liked this quote:-

“Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes, that way when you criticize them, you’re a mile away and you have their shoes.”

And I have just discovered who thought of it. The man is a genius!

“I hope that when I die, people say about me, ‘Boy, that guy sure owed me a lot of money.”

“I bet a funny thing about driving a car off a cliff is, while you’re in midair, you still hit those brakes.”
— Jack Handey