Send to a Friend

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

Arranged married redux, is there still no proof that it is worse than marriage done of freewill even if the bride is a minor or not?

Asked by Hypocrisy_Central (26879points) September 11th, 2016

It has been a few years, new Flutheronians with maybe a new take or direction on arranged marriages. This is NOT A QUESTION about the legality of child brides or advocating if they should be done. THIS IS A QUESTION on if arranged marriages are better or worse for those who do it, if they should partake in it, or if it should not be done. Even though arranged marriages occurs where one or both of the participants can be considered minors in certain parts of the world, and sometimes the wedding to a minor does not make sense, being the female is too young to comprehend they are getting married, in other cases they may be young but know what is going on even if they don’t like it this, it still is a byproduct of the arranged marriage culture. THIS IS NOT AN ENDORSEMENT OR CONDEMNATION of arranged marriage by those instances, but highlighting differences and how people try to filter what is right or not based on WHERE THEY LIVE and what they like; which may not match up with what another part of the world thinks.
I read online, NatGeo I believe, that in many regions (feel free to guess how many is “many”) around the globe from Afghanistan, Yemen, India, and other parts of Asia that arranged marriages with females considered children, still thrive. Would you make a judgment on those who give their daughters away or the men who marry them? The stance of the writer is quite evident in this statement: The outsider’s impulse toward child bride rescue scenarios can be overwhelming: Snatch up the girl, punch out the nearby adults, and run. Just make it stop. Also this statement here: [.. but also for the 13 and the 15-year-old sisters who were being transferred like requisitioned goods, one family to another, because a group of adult males had arranged their futures for them, the idea is to apply a more neutral pragmatic approach. If that is normal for them over there, (going off the ideal to some that there is no normal), why should anyone get bent out of shape? I bet there are practices in the nation or community you live in that others in another country would not approve of, do they have the right to meddle in your affairs to make you or your community or nation stop doing what you are doing?

As far as arranged marriages go, I am not sure there is a side-by-side study to show which marriage survives long-term, but if I had to guess, I would say arranged marriages fare no worse than freewill marriages, and maybe slightly better. I have read an article on arranged marriages where the women interviewed stated they did not like their husbands when they were first mated to them, but grew to love them over the years (NO, this is not ALL of them, so let’s not even go there). Be if a marriage got put together because the parents decided to whom their children are to wed, or left it was by adults choosing of freewill rightly or wrong, where is there definitive proof, apart from emotion or visceral reactions that says an arranged marriage is more likely to be doomed, even if by your laws where you live one or both of the participants would be considered minors, but not alluding just to them?

Using Fluther

or

Using Email

Separate multiple emails with commas.
We’ll only use these emails for this message.