Correct wording? is.. are? cause... causes? please fix this ?! thanks.

Paul’s poor mental and emotional states are what cause him to take his own life.

Or you combine them as “psychological state” and have it be “Paul’s poor psychological state is what causes him…”

“Paul’s poor mental and emotional state is what causes him to take his own life.”

I think it would have been better worded in this way though:

“Paul’s poor mental and emotional states are what caused him to take his own life.”

I’m new to this site. wow, that sure was quick :) Thanks you guys!

@kutelilkat: psst: you should GA those answers! Just click the words below the answer :)

@TitsMcGhee. LOL – nice.

@kutelilkat. You’re welcome and welcome to Fluther too!

lol ;)

Paul’s poor mental and emotional state of mind caused him to take his own life

@discover: Since it’s talking about literature, it should be kept in the present tense, so “cause” or “causes,” not “caused.”

Paul’s poor mental and emotional state is what causes him to take his own life.

It should be “are” and state should be pluralized because mental state and emotional state are two different things, even if they are both under the category of being a “state.” If you want one, combine them into “psychological.”

@TitsMcGhee. Considering that the person took their own life, though, wouldn’t it be past tense now since the event already happened and therefore it would be more gramatically correct as:

“Paul’s poor mental and emotional states are what caused him to take his own life.”

I do understand the literature aspect of it all too. I’m just looking for an opinion on whether the above sentence would be correct if you could have edited it however you wanted to.

@Bluefreedom: Good point, good point. “Are” still leaves it in the present tense, whereas “caused” alone puts it in the past tense.

There are two right answers. You can A) treat “mental state” and “emotional state” as two separate things, in which case you pluralize ‘states’ and use the plural words ‘are’ and ‘cause’. Or B) treat it as one state that both adjectives ‘mental’ and ‘emotional’ are modifying, in which case you leave ‘state’ singular and use the singular words ‘is’ and ‘causes’

Paul’s poor mental and emotional state is what causes him to take his own life.
Paul’s poor mental and emotional states are what cause him to take his own life.

Both are correct.

Both suggested by Mritty and others are indeed correct but I would rethink either of them an an opening sentence about a piece of fiction.

Since this is thesis material, “Considering that the person took his own life) is better that “he took their own life.” I know that is not the topic sentence, but still..

You could try the Camus method. “Paul killed himself yesterday,” (last week, last month, etc.) “Poor emotional and mental states’’ are too vague for fiction or literary exegesis.

“He was in despair.” (Reader then asks, “Why?”

I think saying “mental” and “emotional” are redundant. I would NOT use both.

And there’s always “state of mind”.

You’re running into problems because the phrase “are what causes” is itself awkward and redundant. Just say “cause” and the sentence becomes clearer:

In the short story “Paul’s Case”, Paul’s poor mental and emotional states cause him to take his own life.

It’s still a little weird, and I think Tits is right to suggest “psychological” as a way to combine the two words and try to get at something more specific.

A better thesis sentence would probably be even more specific. Something like:

“In Willa Cather’s short story “Paul’s Case,” Paul’s anguish at the thought of returning to Pittsburgh leads him to take his own life by throwing himself in front of a moving train.”

That still seems a little bad, because I haven’t read the story and I’m not sure what specifically you should say. But be specific. Why did Paul kill himself?

I haven’t read the Cather story either, but I can’t help but be reminded of the other famous fictional character who threw herself in front of a train.

(Hey, Bob. Where ya been?)