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What major life choice/decision would you make/suggest I make?

Asked by tedd (14078points) January 10th, 2011

I find myself at a fork in the road of life. The different directions I have to choose from will all likely lead to a dramatically different life from here on out. As you might expect I am uncertain of what to do. I have been searching for a new job since late summer, and have even had a few job interviews. But for various reasons (some more comically tragic than others) none of the jobs have panned out. Each choice has pros and cons, and really any number of things could happen after each choice, making an almost endless list of possibilities…. But it comes down to three basic choices:

1) I have been offered a job in Pittsburgh working as an admissions rep for online/for profit schools. The job is completely out of my field (Chemistry grad, working as lab tech, looking to get into forensics), but affords me other opportunities. Most importantly I would get free tuition to any of the schools the company manages (which are all accredited). I could get an MBA, a masters in Criminal Justice, Forensic Psychology, etc, etc. It would also move me to a new big city (Pitt), which would be nice because I feel a change of scenery would be good for me at the moment (I’ve been in my current locale for almost 7 years). There are a lot of jobs IN my field in Pittsburgh too, so I could try and find a new one after getting there. The company also has tons of upward career movement possible, if I got there and found I really liked it. Also the pay and benefits would be “slightly” better than I have now. I would have to move away from all of my friends though. But to be honest they are all starting to move away or settle down and drift away.

2) I am likely to be offered a position IN my field back in my home town of Toledo Ohio. Its at the company my mother currently works for (she’s also a lab rat), as a Chemist Technologist. The work would move my career forward somewhat, but would be only slightly better than a lateral move pay/benefits wise. My mother has repeatedly suggested that I should move back in with her temporarily, to help pay down my student loans (they are crippling me at the moment, I pay more in loans than I do in rent). The significant extra money in living with her again sounds great, but I’m not too hyped about the idea because of the stigma of living with your parents at my age and the simple fact that my family drives me nuts. Few of my friends from high school remain there anymore either, and those that do I haven’t really talked to much in years. Not helping matters, Toledo simply isn’t that great of a city. Its like a smaller version of Detroit.

3) I could remain where I live now (in Columbus), and stay at my current job and/or continue to look for a new one. My current job (Senior Lab Tech.) is incredibly boring to me, almost “suffocating.” I have learned all I can at the job, and there is ZERO potential career advancement. The pay is slightly worse than either of the potential jobs, but I am due for a minimal raise soon. My friends all live here and I am established here (as I said I’ve lived here for the past 7 years, went to college here, etc). But I am drifting apart from my friends as they move on with their lives, and honestly I am growing kind of sick of the Columbus area. The job market for my field isn’t as good as it is in Pittsburgh, but I could potentially find a job I want here in the next 6 months or so. Alternatively I’ve been applying to jobs across the country, and I could wait and hope for one of those to pan out.

Now the X factor…. Girls… (duh).....
I was dumped back in October by my g/f of the past two years. She lives in Pittsburgh, and when I started job searching in the summer she was the primary reason I was looking in only Pittsburgh. After the break up I began looking elsewhere as well, but so far only Pittsburgh jobs have called back (save for the one Toledo position). I would be lying if I said her presence in Pittsburgh wasn’t factoring into my head at all (hell I still write her letters and just keep them to myself). Though that said I have tried very vehemently to look at it without “feelings” factoring in.

Making matters more complicated, I have been seeing a girl here in Columbus for the past month or so. I met her online and we’ve been basically dating ever since. She’s an awesome girl, and we connect and “match” on multiple levels (age, career, politics, aspirations, laid back, music, etc, etc ,etc). In my head I know she is “perfect” for me… but in my heart… I am still beyond messed up about the X g/f. If I move to either Toledo or Pittsburgh (or anywhere else for that matter), continuing the relationship with her will almost certainly be impossible. I am attracted to her and the prospect of losing her saddens me, but admittedly I am having some small doubts about it.

Sorry that was so long… but anyways, what would YOU do or suggest?

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