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What do you say when they ask if you're also going to the graveside service when you aren't?

Asked by Aster (20023points) January 19th, 2011

An elderly lady is in a coma. I’ve never talked to her ; just seen her at parties. They will have a viewing, funeral and graveside service.
I wish to send flowers and attend the funeral but don’t wish to go to the graveside service. What should I say when they ask, “are you going to the graveside?” Or should I just go to the viewing? Just answering, “no” begs the question, “why not?” So how should I respond?

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