Women, how has the dichotomy of traditional values and modern necessity of independence affected your general mental well-being?

Men, I want your input here, too.
This Q provoked a discussion via PM about how difficult it is for modern women (of all ages) to juggle the expectations of multiple generations. Our mothers and/or grandmothers were very traditionally raised, with a certain subservience to men, yet have tried to raise their daughters to be whole people with their own value. My friends and I call this the Boomer Conundrum, as on the one hand there was no template for them to use to raise independent, self-reliant daughters, so it was a bit “by guess and by golly”, and on the other hand, the boys of that generation were raised in the same manner as they always had been, thus causing an imbalance in attitude when they all grew up and were interacting in an adult fashion. All this confusion has led women to believe that we have to be strong and competent 24/7, never ask for help, and frankly that makes us just a bit cranky sometimes.
I’d love a discussion, here.