Do you think it's ok to try to separate someone from their original culture/habits (see details)?

We’re focusing on this specific situation.

I have a shipmate (a coworker, as I’m in the navy), who is from the U.S. He has been stationed in Japan for about 6 years. He fell in love with a Japanese woman, they dated for about a year, married, and now they live in the U.S.

I hang out with the couple occasionally. The woman is very obsequious and subservient. She makes all of the food, brings it to you etc. I tried to take my plate to the sink and rinse it off but she wouldn’t let me. Obviously this is a shock to people from the U.S.

Her husband said he’s trying to show her that it’s ok to not be like this. He’s trying to slowly break her out of this habit because he doesn’t want her to think it’s ok to see her role in life this way.

What do you think of the situation? Should he try to break her of her culture or not?