Married people or people in a long term relationship: How is/was your relationship with your in-laws or your SO's parents?

I am thinking of this because I have a good friend who had a very demanding mother-in-law. The MIL expected displays of affection on special occasions, and requested certain gifts of my friend and her husband. My friend was expected to cook big meals for the MIL’s birthday, and all holidays. My friend probably would have done it anyway, but it was expected, which puts a different taint on things.

Now my friend’s oldest son is married with two children. My friend is resentful because her daughter-in-law does not communicate with her and does very little for her in the way of gifts. The son and daughter-in-law live about 500 miles away, so they don’t see them that often, but my friend expressed disappointment today at her daughter-in-law not returning her calls quickly (a few days pass before she gets called back) and my friend said to me in an email “Imagine if I was this way to my mother-in-law?” I reminded her of how she used to feel with her mother-in-law’s demands and entitled attitude, and also since her MIL was local and my friend is not local to her son and his wife, it’s different, too. I told her that displays of affection have more meaning when they’re from the heart and not demanded.

What was/is your relationship like with your in-laws or significant other’s parents? Are they demanding or are they in the background? Are they pushy or are they meek?