Someone I had just met died last week yet I feel nothing?

I was put on a detail for incoming soldiers. We had 3 NCOs none of which had met before so doing PT and working with them a bit of a process for about past month.

One of the NCOs was quite the PT guy. Rucked and ran fast typically on run or ruck days it would just be him and me or maybe one other guy would come with us. Everyone else went to a slower group.

I remember doing the ruck and running with this dam ruck sack bouncing around, but I kept up and got to talk to him talking about his wife and what not just random shit.

I come to find out last week he drowned in a lake supposedly out with his family. I don’t know full details nor do I think finding full story would matter to me. I even got a text from him that Sunday letting me know usual time for PT.

Feels very surreal when I think about it. He was an interesting character to say least what much I do come to know of him. Actually feel a little bit sad writing this and in a way glad I didn’t get to know him then I would feel horrible.

Guess life is strange. Seeing someone working with them getting to know them. Then Gone. Maybe it’s also being in military. Coming and going is just the way goes at times. My child and teen days was a lot this too perhaps I am numb to it all to a degree.

You ever found yourself like this? Strangely though I almost feel bad for not feeling much of anything.