Can we really control who we love?

I am trying hard to understand because I see both sides. I can’t control who I’m attracted to, who I’m compatible with, or who I start to fall in love with. But I think I can control if I want to keep that love going…

Then I think about my ex who I was with for five years. I feel like I made a decision to not love him anymore based on actions. Do I have some feelings of caring? I think I always will but I made a choice to not love him and my actions would prove so. I wouldn’t sacrifice anything I have for him lol. I chose not to feed that feeling I guess.

But then I think, does this apply to family and platonic love as well? I can’t decide to hate my parents can I? I mean if I do hate them I can’t help but feel that way. But then again you can decide by your actions to try and build that loving relationship or live in denial it will always work and be hopeful so you love.