My friend didn’t invite me to her Sweet 16. Should I be Mad?

Asked by RyanS123 (75) December 28th, 2017 from iPhone

For almost a month now, I’ve held a grudge on my friend Rachel. We have been recurring friends since before either of us even finished middle school, and have been in the same friend group for the past several months. One night at the beginning of the month, I heard that most of my friends were going to a Sweet 16. I had no idea who’s party it was and never would have guessed it was Rachel’s since her birthday is in October, but naturally I wondered who the party was for without asking anyone.

Later that night, an acquaintance of mine posted a picture of her and Rachel on her Snapchat story. There was a caption that read: “Happy Birthday Rachel. Thank you for inviting me” or something to that affect. Seeing the picture sent anger through my body, especially since a few people that Rachel has only known for a few months and doesn’t talk to often were there and I wasn’t. That night, I went to bed early, but lay there thinking about how angry I was.

When I came home from school the next day, I told my dad about Rachel and her Sweet 16, thinking he wouldn’t tell my mom. When my mom came home from work, she noticed I was angry. At the time, I was practicing my instrument, so I told my mom that I felt like I was having a hard time plsying the piece I was playing. I got back to practicing in my bedroom, but could hear my dad tell my mom about Rachel and her party.

My mom told me that Rachel’s parents probably let her only invite a certain amount of people. She also said she probably isn’t a true friend and then made things worse by saying that my friends that were there weren’t true friends either, which just made me not want to listen to her.

Rachel doesn’t go to the same school as me, which makes things a lot less dramatic. Her boyfriend and a lot of the friends we share go to school with me, so she does go to some events at my school. Me and my friends saw her and her boyfriend at my schools’s fall play, but her and her boyfriend wanted to sit alone, so I simply avoided them for the rest of the night. Rachel will be at my friend’s Sweet 16 in early January, though, and there’s a good chance we’ll be sitting together since we share a lot of the same friends. Should I just roll my eyes and avoid her, or should I see me not being at her Sweet 16 as no big deal and talk to her? Is she not a real friend since she didn’t invite me?