Is this Intruding On A Marriage?

I have clearly expressed my frustrations with my in laws through this site and here I go again!

As I’ve said before, we rent an apartment in a duplex above my husbands sister, and her husband and kids. We constantly have boundary issues.

His sister has recently got into cooking and can’t for the life of her remember that I have always been a cook and have experienced skills. She will often tell me how something is made or assume I’ve never tried a certain ingredient before. For Xmas she bought us a cast iron skillet and told us we’d love to use it and how to use it etc…. I already had two and used them regularly. It’s just annoying.

I cook mostly vegetarian for both of us even though my husband will eat meat. Since he’s been trying to stick to a healthy diet he prefers our dinners be meat free. Well, just about every night his sister cooks she calls him to tell him to come down and try what she made. She often will give him all the leftovers too. They are always meat heavy dishes that I can’t eat.

One of my joys as his wife is feeding him. He always praises my cooking and I spend a lot of money on interesting ingredients. When she offers him her meals the same time I finish a healthy vegetarian dinner – it makes me feel like I’m being replaced or something.

I know he will always like my cooking and she is just being nice but seriously 5 out of 7 nights she is sending leftover pork and beef meals for him. I wouldn’t mind as much if it was every now and then but it is so frequent.

Aside from all the other ways she intrudes in our marriage, I feel like she is offering ‘better meals’ and I end up looking pale in comparison. I get the feeling she assumes he is starving and hasn’t tasted good food until she offers it.

Would you consider this an intrusion? In a world that there are ‘dynamics’ in a marriage that most people understand, is this a line that she should realize she’s stepping over? Thoughts?