Getting over a broken heart?

I know this question has been asked in various forms in the past, but I wanted some advice on my particular situation.

this isn’t my first heartbreak. In fact I’d call it my third. They have all been very different: the first was in high school after my “first love” and I broke up. The second was after a summer-fling-turned-love ended when I moved to Costa Rica. And the most recent was my first live-in boyfriend. So we have the first love high school boyfriend, the long-distance relationship, and the living together relationship.

They have all been wonderful boys/men—putting up with my typical girl craziness + more. Especially the most recent one, though. He would bend over backwards for me. And even now, in my sadness and rage about the break up, it’s hard for me to pick out his flaws. During our 10-month relationship, I went through a few months where I kept getting really sick, he would drive me to the doctor’s/hospital, take care of me and just wait on me hand and foot. He was wonderful.

We would have our fights of course, but they were big fights. In general, daily life, we were really good friends. so when we fought they were huge blowups. And I’m pretty dramatic and he has a big ego and they didn’t mix well. Nevertheless, the breakup seemed very abrupt. And adding the lease and housing complications doesn’t help.

I just thought that since I had been through this twice before that it wouldn’t be so hard. But it is. I thought I had gained enough self-confidence to deal with it by now. But apparently not. I built my home inside a boy once again. And now I am homeless (regardless of finding another actual house to live in). I do know the steps to take to make it easier. I’ve made a box of things that remind me of him and put it out of sight. I’ve deleted his number from my phone, his email from my address book, his name from my buddy list, etc. But that doesn’t keep from from calling him. I’m addicted, apparently.

I have no more motivation to go to school and I feel like it’s too late to catch up. Even though he’s moving back with his parents soon, where I live is steeped in memories of him, of us, together and happy. And i feel like I may need to move back home, too.

On top of all of this, my friends are alienated and I don’t much feel like speaking to them anyway. So I can’t really reach out to them.

This is really long. I doubt anyone will read it, much less respond, but it felt good to put it out there at least.