What advice would you give to a family that is dealing with the mania of a sibling who has bipolar disorder?

I know that some of you out there have had to deal with siblings with bipolar disorder. A friend of mine asked me to provide support because his brother is in the depths (heights?) of a mania where he is hocking his belongings to raise money to buy pot and hang out at bars and purchase sex, among other things.

As a person who is bipolar, myself, I have some idea of what’s going on inside the brother’s head, but I’ve never had a mania that made me hit the road and go on binges of this kind. The brother knows he has a problem, and he agrees to do all kinds of things, like take meds and sleep properly, and see therapists and whatnot, but he never follows through.

I told them that I thought they should offer support to him, but for one thing—if he checks himself into a hospital. I don’t think they should clean up his messes—financial or personal or otherwise. He’s had family members doing that for him all his life, and my friends have children to bring up, and they need every bit of stability they can get. They already have too much to deal with, without a bipolar brother.

I know there are others out there who have siblings in these situations, and that some have seen the siblings turn around and decide to fight their disorder as best they can. What happened? What happened to help them change their attitudes?

Also, what didn’t work? What kinds of things did you do that helped keep your sibling sick, instead of helping them find a path to health? I think there is a balance between support of health and support for continued illness. It can be a hard line to find, and even if you know where it is, it can be hard to make yourself follow the plan. It’s so easy to fall into a habit of fixing things.

What things worked or didn’t work for you?