Have you abandoned or been abandoned?

Children of parents who divorced often seem to tell stories about deep anger at their fathers. The fathers (an I suppose it could be mothers, too) leave and maybe start a new family or maybe just stop being around, and the children become extraordinarily resentful. It seems like a horrible thing to do to one’s children.

Can the parents really be unaware? Is the new life (or new spouse) more important than anything else? How do parents who depart their families explain (or justify) their behavior? Is it about personal happiness? Or what?

I don’t know if there are any parents out there who have abandoned their children and who would be willing to share their stories. If there are any, I hope you will talk about it.

Or, if there are any children of a mother or a father who disappeared, what did you feel? If your parent ever came back into your life, how did they explain themselves?

And even if you didn’t abandon, but had an amicable divorce, how did your relationship with your children change? Were they angry at one of you more than the other? Did you or your former partner get primary custody? If you didn’t have as much time with your kids, did you miss them, or did you appreciate having more time? Or did you not even really care?

Please, no judging of people’s stories.