Would you say I'm a poseur Buddhist?

The 5 precepts
refrain from harming living creatures
refrain from intoxicants
refrain from telling untruths
refrain from sexual misconduct
Do not take what is not yours
I break them all in the course of a month.
I know what my monks would say, they would barely raise and eyebrow.
My Sensei would just say emphatically, “enjoy your life J****!”
So you see no judgment. and still I hear the words of D.T. Suzuki paraphrased, mysticism aside life is important to exploit it as any lesson.
I would make a poor poster child, but I feel only the slightest twinge of remorse. The spirit is there and so is my heart, to the practice I have chosen. It’s really a no brainer. This is my confession.