Why are we so passive when it comes to funerals?

Not such a depressing topic as at first glance. I have long abhorred the deadly funeral convoy of black cars, heavy expensive coffins and dreary music that often accompanies a funeral may it be a piano or an organ (God forbid).
I saw a program about new types of funerals where, for example the deceased loved one was placed in a whicker basket. Obviously big enough to hold him. His doting daughters dressed him lovingly at home, while every one was in the living room having a cup of tea. They shared some memories about their dad, the good times and bad. While pulling his socks onto his feet. Then put petals around him. The “service” was done by a good friend with words of inspiration chosen by the said friends.

The whole affair was calm and beautiful as they lived near a house with a picturesque lake, and although surreal every one seemed at peace and was casually dressed. All I can remember when my gran died was a dark cloud over everyone, Huge bills, solemn music, solemn appearances with everyone in black, dark cars, scary caskets.

Why do we not decide on how our parents or loved ones are put to rest? Muslims for example wrap you in a shroud and commit you to the earth. Why are paying junk loads of money for caskets we see for an hour and our loved one never sees. I think its time to protest and change the process of dying to best suit us, instead of the other way around.