How do you ask people to pay for your work when they think it should be free?

I am a writer and an editor. I am a grunt writer (as opposed to a grant writer.) This means that I write and edit other people’s work——as a ghost writer at times. I am also a copywriter. I freelance. This is one of my vocations. I am good at what I do. However, because I am good at what I do…family and friends ask me (too often, in my opinion) to “help” them with writing projects.. And then, they never offer to compensate me. They feel, “She’s so good at it, she can do it in no time.” They have no idea how long it takes me to write things and edit them. Yes, I can write quickly, but it takes a lot more time depending on the project. Over the years, I have written term papers, edited news releases, written eulogies, political speeches…..you name it. “Oh, just ask Rhad…she’s great at that.” I once helped a cousin of mine (who is a millionaire) do a project that took ten hours of my time…and she came over, took the paper and said, “Thank you sooo much.” And exited. (Uh….what?)

Today, I got an email from one of my closest friends. She needs me to write a letter to accompany a grant that she is seeking for the restoration of an old hotel that belongs to her family. It was badly damaged in a flood. I love this person dearly, but I am fairly sure that I (once again) will be expected to work gratis. She can afford to pay me as she often pays for other services and pays well. There was no mention of any compensation. I even feel strange getting on Fluther to talk about this because a) I feel like a pushover and b) I feel guilty that I am not just sooo happy to help out a friend.

How on earth do you let people know that you do not do work for free without sounding caustic or rude? I couldn’t imagine myself going to a family friend who is an architect and saying, “Listen, I know you design houses….could you just rustle up one for me?” or to a shop owner who might be related to me and say, “I love that red dress in the window….we’re family…how about just _giving_it to me?”

I suppose I am also writing this for all the Jellies who are trying to make a living doing what they love to do——or what they need to do…and deserve to get paid. No matter how easy it seems to be to do.

I would appreciate any suggestions. Thanks so much!

P.S. By the way, I would not charge someone who did not have any means to pay. It’s the others that can that I find difficult.