Social Question

Facade's avatar

When does the desire to look good become narcissism?

Asked by Facade (22833 points ) March 8th, 2011

That’s it.

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15 Answers

marinelife's avatar

When looking good is all you can think about.

When you can’t walk past a mirror without checking yourself out.

(BTW, that’s still not narcissism, which is more than about looking good.)

Scooby's avatar

When you just think you’re better than everyone else….. :-/
In every way…....

JmacOroni's avatar

I can’t walk past a reflective surface without checking my reflection… and I’m far from narcissistic.
When your appearance trumps all else in importance. Though, I’m having a hard time making a real link between obsessing over looking good and narcissism. Vanity, maybe, but narcissism seems far more involved than just one factor, like appearance.

Facade's avatar

I guess I don’t really know what narcissism is

wundayatta's avatar

Here’s a table from Wikipedia that should help:

Characteristic….........Healthy Narcissism…............Destructive Narcissism

Self-confidence….........High outward self-confidence….An unrealistic sense of superiority ..................................in line with reality….................(“Grandiose”)

Desire for power,..........May enjoy power…..................Pursues power at all costs, ..................................wealth and admiration…...........lacks normal inhibitions in its
................................................................................pursuit

Relationships…...........Real concern for others and…...Concerns limited to expressing
..................................their ideas; does not exploit…...socially appropriate response
..................................or devalue others…...................when convenient; devalues and
................................................................................exploits others without remorse
.
Ability to follow…........ Has values; follows through…... Lacks values; easily bored; a consistent path…........on plans…...............................often changes course

Foundation…...............Healthy childhood with support ..Traumatic childhood undercutting
..................................for self-esteem and appropriate…true sense of self-esteem and/or
..................................limits on behaviour towards…..... learning that he/she doesn’t need
..................................others…....................................to be considerate of others

DancingMind's avatar

This is what I understand it as:

It’s usually a thick mask people put up for some deep insecurities/inabilities to deal with things/fears of being unwanted/etc.
It’s not as simple as “I love myself”. It’s ”See, I love myself. See, I’m wonderful.” It’s a show, and that’s why it can irritate people.
Looking at yourself in a mirror, doesn’t mean Narcissism.
Obsessively making a big deal out of admiring yourself, loudly commenting on how amazing you look and are, demanding others tell you how wonderful you are as well… I’d call that Narcissism. It’s not the desire to look good, per se, but a need to look good and make others tell you that you look good, or else not be able to funtion.
It looks like you love yourself, but usually on the inside it’s not that way.

Coloma's avatar

Yep, all good answers above.
I’d ad, the biggest difference is between enjoying looking your best vs. absolute TERROR that all one has to offer is their externals.

Far too many true narcissists live in terror of losing their looks, power, prestige, etc. because they do not feel they have enough solid inner qualities to trump their phony seduction cards.

The sexiest parts of me are my brain, my spine and my guts. lol

I have so many friends freaking out about losing their looks now that we are getting a bit older.

Bah…I’ve had a good run and I am much more proud of WHO I am than how I LOOK!

As it should be. ;-)

seazen's avatar

I shave with a mirror.

I get dressed. I check the mirror for a second.

That’s it.

Another second would be narcissism. (For me, for me, I only mean for me – chill.)

SpatzieLover's avatar

When I think of narcissism, Paris Hilton instantly comes to mind. these are pics from inside her real home…NO KIDDING!!!

If you see someone walking down the street and they instantly pose when they see a camera, they’re prolly narcissistic.

If all you see in a person’s home are half naked photos blown up onto huge canvases, they’re narcissistic.

If a person moves you out of the way to look at themselves in a store window, a mall mirror, a car side-view mirror…they’re a narcissist.

Facade's avatar

@SpatzieLover A pillow of her face? Really?

GAs everyone =)

SpatzieLover's avatar

@Facade Seriously. I happened to catch her house on one of those dumb MTV shows one day when I was sick. I was shocked by how much Paris there was in Paris’s house. It’s seriously unhealthy to like yourself that much. She has enormous artwork of herself in almost every room. Sick.

Facade's avatar

@SpatzieLover To top it all off, she’s only attractive in the sense that porn stars are “attractive.”

SpatzieLover's avatar

@Facade No kidding
She always reminds me of one of those kids you see on that kiddie beauty pageant show, that’s grown up & gone porno.

seazen's avatar

I think I caught vd just from watching that slide show.

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