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sccrowell's avatar

Brother & Sister Fluthers! A friend of mine needs your help...

Asked by sccrowell (3508points) May 10th, 2008 from iPhone

She and her daughter were invited to out to dinner tonight by her daughter’s (age 38) new boyfriend (age 43) and his mother. The boyfriend would like the two mothers to meet. Vergine(my friend) would like to know if she should bring something?She was thinking, perhaps some chocolate. What would you suggest?

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15 Answers

NVOldGuy's avatar

Out to dinner or at someone’s place?
Out – no Someone’s house – I would go with flowers or wine.

Response moderated
wildflower's avatar

I agree with nvoldguy. If restaurant, probably not expected, but if at home it would be odd not to. Having said that, a box of chocolates or handmade sweets can’t go wrong – unless the other one is diabetic or seriously dieting.

sccrowell's avatar

Daughter & Mother were invited to a restaurant.

Iphone35's avatar

Well sccrowell, I don’t think your friend vergine would need to bring anything other than herself and her mom, the boyfriend as you mentioned just wants the moms to meet therefore vergine & her mom should just look forward to a nice dinner.

Best wishes

richmarshall's avatar

Ditto that. Invited to a home bring wine, to a restaurant bring smiles and good conversation.

babygalll's avatar

If they were invited to a restaurant no, but if it’s a Mother’s Day thing you can show up with something. Just keep in mind both Mothers.

anonyjelly16's avatar

If I were going to someone’s home, I would bring an item already suggested above and follow up later with a hand-written card.

However, if it were a restaurant, I wouldn’t bring anything. Instead, while at the restaurant, I would try and be pleasant and try to figure out if they like a particular store (based on their conversation, article of clothing, etc.)—or even tactfully express admiration for their shoes/clothing/anything else and find out where they got it.

Then, I would surprise them later with a sincere hand-written thank you card and a gift certificate to a place that they mentioned they liked. As an alternative, a hand-written thank you card and some flowers delivered to them would also be a very nice gesture.

All you really want to convey is that you are/were genuinely interested in them and sincerely appreciated their hospitality. So long as it is genuine and sincere, whatever you do will be just fine. Don’t worry so much about “etiquette” and go with what feels right to you.

Britcraft86's avatar

flowers would be a nice touch, no roses, that would be to much, maybe some pacific paradise, its cheap but exotic flowers that are a nice touch, hope this helps

Bub's avatar

She probably doesn’t need to bring anything on a first meeting.

marinelife's avatar

Not for the other mother I don’t think who might feel bad if she had brought nothing. A thank you to the host boyfriend for the dinner. Perhaps a reciprocal invitation to a meal at her house later or a small gift of something the boyfriend likes sent via daughter later.

breanne's avatar

I wouldn’t bring anything to a restaurant, but if she wants to make an exceptional impression, she might consider sending the mother a card in the mail saying how much she enjoyed meeting them and hope that they can do it again sometime… unless she turns out to be wretched ;) Anything more than that might seem kind of pushy and lay the groundwork for future high expectations, and giving a gift might ultimately make the other party uncomfortable.

judochop's avatar

a bottle of 42below vodka and some fresh herbs to make cocktails and loosen the group up.

sccrowell's avatar

Vergine asked if I would please thank all of you who took the time to read her/my message, but more importantly to those of you who responded. She also asked Hi this is Sherry’s friend Vergine, first, thanks everyone last night went very well. I took your advice and combined some. Went out to dinner, I brought only my mom & smiles! After dinner we, my mom& I invited Vihik and his mother to our home for coffee and a small gift to Vihik’s mom. Flowers. I sent a thank you note to Vihiks mom & secretly one to Vihik. So thanx everyone!!!! Here’s Sherry.. Thanks everyone for your input! Vergine says if she ever has a problem, she knows whom to ask for advice!

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