What kind of problems would a boy have to do this at school?

I did the same thing, multiple times, and I think I turned out pretty good. Just because someone smokes weed doesn’t mean they have to have “problems”.

Yes, I agree but I thought it was a sign of major problems to be smoking on school grounds and cutting classes at thirteen? The principal thought it was pretty serious.

He needs to be in therapy. Smoking weed at 13 is early but not unusual. He should not be written off at this time. Sounds like he has had a chaotic family and needs some non- judgmental guidance.

I am not downplaying the seriousness of his issue, but school principals, especially in middle school, are generally focused on being hardnosed about any violations.

13–14 seems to be the jumping off place for a lot of teens. While I’d be concerned, and certainly want to see some consequences for his poor choices, I wouldn’t be too hasty in labeling the boy as a problem child.

He needs to be educated about his choices, and respectful of school protocol but not shamed and blacklisted.

It’s not too late. He needs discipline and love and boundaries. He probably needs a strong male figure in his life (perhaps A Big Brother?).

IMHO, what he needs is some good positive role models in his life, preferably male ones. Is there a local “Big Brother” program he might turn to? Does he know any adult males that can help him understand that all of those feelings he suddenly has are normal and do not have to manifest themselves in aggressive or otherwise socially destructive behavior?

How about you? You seem to have his best interest at heart.

@Aster That simply means the principal is a hard assed idiot that has watched too many of those “Marajuana is a gateway drug.” after school specials.

Most of the people I know started smoking weed when they were about 14. As for doing it at school, I guess that is the prime age to start trying out being ~rebellious~. Not sure if this is actually indicative of any problem other than being a teenager.

I also don’t see any correlation between the situation and him needing a ‘male figure’ in his life as I’ve seen suggested. Weed—-> not enough ‘masculinity’ in his life? What?

Just as girls need the influence of women to shepherd them through the wild ride that the maturation process takes them through, boys benefit from interaction with positive male role models. Such a positive role model can make a big difference in the choices a teenager makes.

I am not, of course, suggesting that there are not plenty of excellent female role models out there that boys can look up to as well, but just as a young girl is often apt to identify more with a female confidant, boys often find it easier to identify with men.

Now here’s the politically incorrect part I’m sure that some radical feminist will probably go apey over, but at the end of the day boys and girls are simply wired differently and the hormonal changes that occur during the maturation process effect them differently. In boys the testosterone surge drives them to some fairly “ugly” emotional states that often manifest themselves in the types of poor choices being discussed here. What they do not need is a women over analyzing the crap out of them and making them feel as though they are somehow defective for having those feelings. What they do need is a well adjusted adult male to help them come to grips with what it is to be a good man.