Social Question

Hibernate's avatar

How often do you asume what others are thinking?

Asked by Hibernate (9019 points ) October 16th, 2011

Doesn’t matter what situation. Just tell us how often you do it ^^

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29 Answers

abysmalbeauty's avatar

All the time. I probably assume thoughts more then people actually communicate them to me. Its a very bad habit.

marinelife's avatar

Not often any more. I have learned that such assumptions are usually more about the person doing the assuming than the reality of what the other is thinking.

JLeslie's avatar

Probably pretty often, but I also ask them directly what they mean or are thinking the majority of the time to check if my assumption is right or not.

poisonedantidote's avatar

It depends on the person I’m talking to, but generally I do it probably less than average, as I do conciously try to not generalize or make assumptions and so on.

If I’m talking to a boss who makes vague statements, I’ll fill in the blanks quite a lot. If I’m talking to a direct boss who speaks his mind and is blunt, I wont assume anything.

Mantralantis's avatar

Okay, this one I will defend…with respect, of course. My view on this is that I know I can assume a bit more assumingly than I should about what others are thinking or to say next. However, since I do strongly assume, I fell most others do it just as strongly, even without truthfully admitting it. So there you have it from me.

Ayesha's avatar

I don’t. I don’t care.

dabbler's avatar

Is it still an assumption if you make an effort to confirm your developping conclusion?
I constantly notice where I’m filling in the blanks (the assumption) and try to get some confirmation about what I perceived.
As the old saying goes “assume makes an ass out of U and me”.
If it’s important, it’s worth being certain. It’s just too easy to make a bad decision based on assumptions and it’s not necessary.

bluejay's avatar

I rarely assume thoughts. More than often I make a prediction on a persons thoughts, read their body language, ask them questions, and study their thoughts…. I have odd interests :)

wonderingwhy's avatar

Most of the time, unless I need/want to know – then I ask, it’s just easier that way. Of course that assumes that I’m considering what they’re thinking to begin with which isn’t always the case.

filmfann's avatar

What you are really asking is often do we believe we understand someone’s motivation, and substitute our own incite, rather than accurately predict someones postition on a matter.
I think you’re also recognizing that some are better at this than others.

cookieman's avatar

I will generally run through possible scenarios in my head if the person in question is vague or not particularly forthcoming. After a few minutes of contemplating the possibilities, I’ll either A) ask them directly for clarification (if it’s something important), or B) let it go and forget about it. I won’t linger on it beyond that.

Generally though, I make it a habit of taking people at their word. Looking for subtext is often frustrating and inaccurate and speaks more about my bias than reality. Ultimately a waste of time.

Mantralantis's avatar

To me, ‘predicting’ has always meant the same to me as ‘assuming’. Not by definition, mind you, but by the way they both seem to stick out their noses, so to speak. I don’t know, maybe we all just assume to much when it comes to discussiing about the subject of assuming. Or predictiing. Whatever the case may be at the time.

Coloma's avatar

Assumptions are almost always wrong. Nobody is a mind reader. I don’t even go there, and, the times that I have made assumptions, I have almost always been wrong.

The only time an assumption may be correct is when there have been numerous experiences to back it up, ” Hmmm..lets see, I KNOW my boss is a jerk in the morning, sooo, the odds are I can assume he will be a jerk this morning too! ” LOL

Mantralantis's avatar

@Coloma – Yeah, loma, haha, but that could actually come true. Oh, wait. That’s a prediction, right?

Leanne1986's avatar

Quite a lot and it’s always a negative thing.

Mantralantis's avatar

@Leanne1986 – Hi, Leanne. I’m not sure what you meant by your comment. Can you elaborate, please?

ratboy's avatar

I don’t have to, I know.

tinyfaery's avatar

Not much anymore. I still think I am a good read of people (in person), but assumptions are for the egotists and psychics and I am neither.

linguaphile's avatar

According to communication theorists, we assume every time we have a conversation. We interpret the sender’s message based on our assumption of their intent. Even if the assumption of the sender’s intent is accurate, is still an assumption.

On a social level, assuming others’ opinions or thoughts, that’s different.

I try not to, but I’m deeply trained to. I’ve had to assume, guess, fill-in-the-blanks, etc, to survive.

spykenij's avatar

Too damn much to the point where sometimes it makes me want to never leave the house again. I need to recognize that those are just MY thoughts and I need to et them go. I wish I saw it this way 2+ yrs ago.

Linda_Owl's avatar

Sometimes I wonder & sometimes I simply start a conversation & then we can exchange ideas.

desiree333's avatar

ALL THE TIME. I’m not a psychology major for nothing.

thesparrow's avatar

I usually do it all the time.

Leanne1986's avatar

@Mantralantis It means I over analyse everything people say/do to me and think the worst about what they may be thinking.

6rant6's avatar

Oh, I know what this question is really about.

Hibernate's avatar

@6rant6 not really. When I first thought of asking this we had to go with a family member at the hospital because he was sick. Nobody had time to help him accommodate there and all the nurses and doctors assuming bunch of things about us. I had to tell them to stop mumbling before they understood the whole situation and why we couldn’t stay and help him.

You did the exact thing :) You assumed you know :)

6rant6's avatar

@Hibernate Yeah, well, really, it was a joke.

Hibernate's avatar

That’s why I didn’t say you are ignorant or anything :)

Sher_King's avatar

pffffffffff all the time! And their usually not wrong.

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