Social Question

boxer3's avatar

How trusting are you?

Asked by boxer3 (4142 points ) December 5th, 2011

Holy schmokes.
I mostly lost my voice today, probably because I’m getting sick-
and had a presentation I needed to do for a final in one of my courses. I decided to go buy some tea to help
alleviate the raspy-ness of the still audible attempt at speech I’ve been producing.

As I was leaving campus to head to a coffee shop, I passed one of my friends and told him he should come kill some extra time he had and grab a tea. He got in the vehicle, and we headed to Dunkin Donuts.

I was going to go to the drive through so I pulled in the parking lot on the side of the store first, to get my money out from where I keep it in the car, because I hate making the people that work there wait, since I worked at Dunkin for many years and know it can be annoying.

Anyway next thing I know I’m about to reverse to go to the window and I see someone coming at a rapid pace to the passengers side door. I tell my friend and at that time some girl, which I now know to be his girlfriend is banging on the window yelling at him, and why are we pulled off to the side, and who am I, and she saw me “pick him up” from the school.

Holy shit. I was shocked. I literally, am just friends with this dude, and tried to talk to her, even got out of the car to try and rationalize her false assumptions. but she was not trying to hear me. All I could think of, was that I’d never want to be in a relationship where trust was so scarce.

I know that girl doesn’t know me or really have a reason to believe I’m being honest but it just blew me away, and I’m thinking about it still, now, 5 hours later.

How trusting are you, would you follow your SO.
Would you ask what’s going on and listen or would you accuse?
Any stories, or opinions you’d care to share?

Observing members: 0 Composing members: 0

14 Answers

digitalimpression's avatar

I wouldn’t follow my SO. If it’s going to happen, it’s going to happen. I just hope she has the common decency to let me know so I can find someone else who isn’t as morally inept.

Neizvestnaya's avatar

Trusting enough to believe my SO when they agree they’ll never give me reason to freak out like that.

wundayatta's avatar

Men and women are not allowed to be friends. You read the handbook, right? Well, if you didn’t, there’s no excuse. In section 21, chapter 12 through 18 of the Handbook of Interpersonal Relations of All Types (HIRAT), it clearly states that men and women may not be friends. It’s impossible. If a man and a woman are together for more then ten minutes alone, there is hanky-panky going on. Period.

Ask your friend’s girlfriend. She knows. I’m surprised you don’t.~

boxer3's avatar

@digitalimpression, @Neizvestnaya : thank you. ha.
@wundayatta, hahaha, yeah….. I mean I’ve heard that, but I think that’s a big generalization, and pretty goddamn unfair. .If I can’t trust my SO, I don’t want to be dating him. I want to trust that he does not need to be babysat and can make good decisions on his own with no supervision.

blueiiznh's avatar

Very trusting until given a reason (red flag) to not trust.
I would not follow SO. I would certainly ask and listen first.
Personal experiences on this topic are not worth reliving the pain to type it out.

perspicacious's avatar

I trust until you give me a reason not to. I didn’t read your novella.

boxer3's avatar

@perspicacious, that’s alright- it was pretty lengthy. Thanks for the answer.

wundayatta's avatar

@boxer3 Just to be sure, I want to make sure you know what the ~ symbol means. My comment was very tongue-in-cheek.

dannyc's avatar

I trust till I can’t. Then I cry. And I have.

augustlan's avatar

Wow, that’s crazy. I trust my husband to have female friends, and he trusts me to have male friends. If I were concerned about something, I’d talk to him about it… not chase him down and throw a fit. Sheesh.

boxer3's avatar

@wundayatta I didn’t know what that symbol meant but I got that vibe, thanks for the clarification though haha. I never really understood why people really felt that way ha. Oh well what am I gonna do, right?

boxer3's avatar

@augustlan, hooray for being level headed haha

I like your festive avatar by the way

boxer3's avatar

If anyone is still following the thread, I wanted to say that the girlfriend of my friend- got my number from his phone and called to apologize, which I thought was admirable.

augustlan's avatar

@boxer3 Well that’s nice, at least. Unfortunately for your friend, I bet it will happen again, though.

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