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Sayd_Whater's avatar

To INTJ guys: Do you tend to like ENTP girls? And to ENTP girls: Do you tend to like INTJ guys?

Asked by Sayd_Whater (391 points ) 1 month ago

I’m an ENTP type of girl and I’ve recently discovered that ENTP and INTJ should get along pretty good because of what I’ve read about the matching personalities.
However, the weird thing is that, after running through my friends, none of them got INTJ… I also saw somewhere that being an ENTP and a GIRL is an extreme rare thing!
So, are there any INTJ guys in here, that have ever meet, and specially, enjoy an ENTP, type of girl? Would you generally agree that INTJ guy + ENTP girl is a good match? Or, were you ever able to find these type of personalities among your close friends?

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52 Answers

El_Cadejo's avatar

Coincidentally enough I am INTJ and my fiance is ENTP. She kinda borders between introvert and extrovert though.

Coloma's avatar

Hahaha…right up my alley here.
I am a female ENTP and have not met a met INTJ, however, that said, I did date a male ENTJ once and he was the most exhausting person ever. Controlling, know it all, bossy, the debate king from hell, EVERYTHING turned into a debate. I couldn’t handle it, at all.

As an ENTP I am bright, highly creative, funny as hell and love stimulating discussion but I am also very diplomatic, non-abrasive, easy going, live and let live, and have no interest in every “conversation” sharing of opinions, turning into an egoic duel to the death.
I’d really like to meet a male ENTP that was mature and easy going like I am, I adore quick wit, playfulness and intelligence but that ENTJ guy left me feeling like I had been run over by a freaking semi. lol

Coloma's avatar

@El_Cadejo Yes, ENTPs are known as the most introverted of the extroverts. I am the same. I am either in social mode and comedienne mode or a total hermit. I can easily amuse myself for days on end if there is nobody available that I find fun and interesting. It’s a quality thing and I have no interest in mundane small talk or just being around people for the sake of a body in my presence if I am not going to enjoy engaging.

Coloma's avatar

@Sayd_Whater Yes, female ENTPs are very rare.
‘They” estimate only 3–4% of the population is ENTP and females at only 1% of that! We are rare birds and should not settle for dumb ducks.
I have always had a very hard time finding compatible people, in general, let alone romantic partners.

I was married to an ISTJ for years and it was a match made in hell.
Free spirited creative with anal, OCD control freak. Now that I have been a student of personality theory for some years I realize that SJ types are the antithesis of compatibility for me. I do have a female ISTJ friend and while she can drive me nuts with her OCD work ethic she is surprisingly open minded, not something you get unless you are dealing with a well developed SJ.

I loathe unhealthy ISFJ’s, so manipulative and passive aggressive and don’t do well under developed ” feelers” always emotionally fragile, high maintenance, upset over something, neurotic and exhausting. Man, have I learned a lot over the years. haha

Seek's avatar

I’m a female INTJ, and my husband is an ENTP.

I brood, he pukes rainbows. He drags me out of my shell, I calm his crazy ass down from time to time.

ARE_you_kidding_me's avatar

I’m guessing my wife is ESFJ, I’m INTJ.

filmfann's avatar

@Blondesjon I wish I could lurve that repeatedly.

Paradox25's avatar

I’ve heard that INTJs are the least desirable of guys for most women since these guys aren’t the status quo of male expectations. My scores seem to be divided between being an INTJ and an INTP, but my experience with women in the past tells me this may be true. Personally I don’t care what label a woman is, as long as I don’t have to put up a facade in order for them to like me.

Coloma's avatar

@Seek Haha..I know, I can be highly enthusiastic at times, and adrenaline is my middle name. I have 2 speeds only. Couch potato or racehorse. lol
There is virtually no middle ground.
I have mellowed a lot in my middle age, but when I am stressed or excited about something my energy hits warp speed, as in ” slow down and STFU”. haha

I think ENTPs can burn themselves out easily and also because we are thinkers not sensors we can get really out of touch with our bodies. Ignore them until they break down.
When we are in our inferior mode then we can become a little hypochondriac, start being overly focused on our bodies.” Wow, has that weird little bump always been on my arm or am I dying from elbow cancer.” lol

IheartMypuppy's avatar

What is an INTJ and an ENTP?

El_Cadejo's avatar

@Paradox25 “since these guys aren’t the status quo of male expectations.”
Hahah couldn’t describe me better. Machismo is a fucking joke to me.

IheartMypuppy's avatar

So what is an INTJ and an ENTP?

Seek's avatar

@IheartMypuppy

Without getting too deep into it, the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) is a shorthand reference for personality types. It uses four binary traits and sticks them together for a maximum of sixteen “types”.

An INTJ is Introverted, Intuitive, Thinking, Judging. A “Scientist” type.

An ENTP is Extroverted, Intuitive, Thinking, Perceiving. A “Lawyer”, “Inventor” or “Visionary” type.

IheartMypuppy's avatar

What are all the types then?

Seek's avatar

There’s

Introversion
Extroversion

Intuition
Sensing

Thinking
Feeling

Perceiving
Judging

Pick one from each pair.

IheartMypuppy's avatar

ohhhhh, thanks

Seek's avatar

Most people are a little of both or a lot of both in all categories. I’m pretty strongly INTJ, but my husband is almost equally ENTP and ENFP. Thinking and feeling both come easily to him.

IheartMypuppy's avatar

wait, wouldn’t INTJ actually be IITJ?

Seek's avatar

Well, can’t have two “I“s, as that would be confusing. So the second I, for Intuition, became an “N”.

Seek's avatar

http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/jtypes2.asp

You can test yourself there. All yes/no questions.

Post your result here. I have a guess for what your result will be, and I want to see if I’m right. ^_^

Seek's avatar

BAM I WAS RIGHT!

IheartMypuppy's avatar

How could you be right @Seek?

IheartMypuppy's avatar

But…......................

Seek's avatar

I guessed you’d be an SFP type. I wasn’t sure whether it would be introvert or extrovert, but I just KNEW it would be SFP.

IheartMypuppy's avatar

I got the Perfecto-Fish award

IheartMypuppy's avatar

How’d you guess that?

Seek's avatar

If you were an NT, you’d have looked up what the MBTI was yourself instead of waiting for someone to explain it to you. The P was mostly a guess.

IheartMypuppy's avatar

I’m on a crusade to get all the awards that I possibly can get, and especially the hard ones to get

Seek's avatar

Good luck! I’ve been here since 2009 and I don’t even have all of them.
And I’m pretty sure some of them are broken.

IheartMypuppy's avatar

do you have the perfecto-fish?

IheartMypuppy's avatar

how’d you get the to other Atlantis ones?

Seek's avatar

Let’s talk in PM – we’ve hijacked this thread long enough.

IheartMypuppy's avatar

ok, now this is really going off topic

Coloma's avatar

@Seek Hahaha….so dead on that the NT would immediately look up the answers.
We jast HAVE to KNOW and right NOW! lol

whitenoise's avatar

You realize that there are no such people as “ENTP” people, right?

The Myers Briggs systm has little validity and even less scientific justification (see here, for instance). The results of the test vary immensely from one test to the next over time.

ENTP is just a Myers Briggs test result. It is the result of a particular test one took at a particular time. Nothing more, nothing less. If you truly think you can clasify people along these results, you are seriously underestimating the complexity and situational dependency of human psychology.

If you are looking for more scientifically based, consistent personality indicators, look at the big-5 model. Wikipedia

Coloma's avatar

@whitenoise The Big 5 model is helpful indeed, however, I have extreme confidence in the MBTI model as well. They are another valuable tool that can be applied in many areas of ones life. Types don’t change, what changes is the level of ones emotional health. Under great stress all types will revert to their inferior modes, the opposites of their true type.

If one takes the MBTI tests, answers honestly, and is in good mental and emotional health their true type will emerge. I have consistently typed ENTP for years.
Brain stack functions are natural traits, the way we absorb, assimilate and process information, which varies from person to person. While these tests do not define the totality of an individual they are invaluable tools towards self and other understanding.

Paradox25's avatar

@El_Cadejo This is why I frequently get ticked at many progressives, because there’s a whole bunch of us males who would gladly give up our supposed ‘privileges’.

Seek's avatar

Hm. The Big Five seems to pigeonhole people into positive vs. negative. Like there is an ideal that most people should strive for, and if you hit the opposite end of any of those traits then there is something wrong with you.

Coloma's avatar

@Seek I think it is about optimum qualities, but yes, it can seem that way.

whitenoise's avatar

Myers Briggs is just an invalid system. Entertainment at best.

Abused as selection criterium for jobs at its worst.

It’s like homeopathy.

Paradox25's avatar

@whitenoise I agree with you to a reasonable extent. However, I really do think there’s definitely some truth to the Dunning-Kruger Effect. I brought this up because INTPs and INTJs appear to be among the least likely to ‘suffer’ from this.

Coloma's avatar

^^^ Sounds like arrogant asshole effect in laymans terms. lol
@whitenoise Doubt all you want, that’s your perspective and you are entitled to it, but when I discovered the MBTI about 10 years ago, it was life changing. So accurate, a perfect fit and made sense of why I am the way I am. Far too uncannily on the mark to be denied.
An ENTP, spawn of my INTP dad, who really was an Architect. haha

Coloma's avatar

Infact, I think there should be MBTI genetics. haha
My mother was ENFP and my dad INTP and I came out ENTP. Pretty damn perfect blend IMO. Sandwiched between the emotional musician and the quiet architect came a wild little monkey girl. lol

El_Cadejo's avatar

@Coloma I feel the same way about the MBTI. It may not be totally backed by studies, but it described me almost perfectly. It really put a lot of my personality traits into perspective, it also helped me identify a lot of my weaknesses. Maybe it’s just coincidental, but I’m an INTJ and got a degree in a science field.

Coloma's avatar

@El_Cadejo Agreed. Everybody sing now…... Then I saw my type and I’m a believer, I couldn’t leave the MBTI lol

Coloma's avatar

and I’m a female George Carlin. A lot of comedians are ENTP, think Robin Williams, Jim Carry, Goldie Hawn, Carol Burnett and Alicia Silverstone. Off the wall, fast brained, brilliant ding dongs. Breed an Arcitect to a musician get a comedian. lol

Seek's avatar

And a lot of… well, a lot of fictional awesome people are INTJ. Think Sherlock Holmes, Gandalf, and Dr. House.

Richard Dawkins is probably an INTJ.

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