Social Question

nerdgirl578's avatar

Has a small comment by a stranger ever made a big difference to you (or the other way around)?

Asked by nerdgirl578 (1453points) August 17th, 2019

I’m asking because recently I came across a post on another site where a boy was talking about a girl he was in love with. I think he was like 14 or 15, and he had met this girl online through a game.

He described her and their conversations and that he really liked her, and it was pretty obvious she liked him too. He wasn’t sure if he was going to do anything about it though.
I found it cute and responded something like he seemed to be a nice guy and I whished him luck with the girl. Nothing profound at all, just a friendly comment.

About a week later he sent me a message thanking me and telling me my comment made him think and got him to work up the courage to tell the girl how he felt and now he had this amazing girlfriend.

The reason I’m telling you this is I didn’t even give him advice, I just posted a kind comment which took like 5 seconds. Apparently even I, who know nothing about anything, can make a difference for someone by doing almost nothing. And he was really sweet to take the time to tell me about it, which obviously made my day. I don’t now, it just made me think about what really small things can do sometimes.

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14 Answers

raum's avatar

Have been on both ends of this experience many times. I think a large part of it has to do with timing.

Glad to hear you made such a difference to someone. Hope it works out for them :)

nerdgirl578's avatar

@raum Timing, exactly! One of the things it made me think about was that you never know where the other person is (emotionally) when you communicate online. And if a small casual kind comment like that could make such a difference, could a small casual negative comment make an equally big impact the other way? Probably…

SEKA's avatar

Mine wasn’t a comment. It was something as simple as a smile. I was a waitress at a bar and was the only waitress that night as the other had called in sick. I knew my service was going to be a tad slower than it should be so I made it a point to listen for the front door opening so I could acknowledge that someone new had entered. The door opened, I looked up and smiled at the guy that came in. When I got to his table, I apologized for being a little tardy getting to him and explained that I was the only waitress on duty. I took his order and proceeded to do my job. He had one drink then left leaving no tip. I felt bad because I knew that I was doing the best I could under the circumstances. The next night he came back in and called me over to his table. He handed me $5 and apologized for stiffing me the night before. He explained to me that I had possibly saved his life as when he came in he had all intent to kill himself when he arrived home. He said that my warm smile and great attitude had made him realize that life wasn’t as bad as he had been thinking and decided to give it another try. This time he had several drinks and left me a $20 tip. He came in a few more times over the next month or so, always said hi, had a few drinks, and left. He seemed to be a nice guy who was going through a bad time and I often wonder what happened to him over the years. Now I do my best to always offer a smile with a kind word to most of the people I meet just in case they’re having a really bad day!

nerdgirl578's avatar

@SEKA Wow, that’s a great story!

emorris24's avatar

I’ve been the recipient of people paying the remaining balance of a purchase at a grocery store or Walmart. It really brings me joy to see that with all the violence and negativity, there is still good people.

nerdgirl578's avatar

@emorris24 That’s nice, I’ve seen people do that too. Actually I think people do things like that all the time, you just don’t hear about it as much as violence and crime. I think that’s important to remember.

Mastema2's avatar

Sometimes a simple look reveals my more “Unpleasant” side.

nerdgirl578's avatar

@Mastema2 And what is that?

Mastema2's avatar

@nerdgirl578 A sinister side of me I keep away for the most part.

nerdgirl578's avatar

@Mastema2 That’s not really an answer to my question. I want to know about the sinister part!

Mastema2's avatar

@nerdgirl578 Fair enough.

One example: I was on a motorcycle stopped at a light with thick traffic. There was a guy next to me in a Dodge diesel truck that kept revving it up. I looked at him through the passenger side of his truck and he revved it up more and covered me and everyone else with black smoke while his disgusting face smirked at me. I put the kickstand down and walked to the back of his truck and jumped up and down on his exhaust tip repeatedly until it bent into the road. He stepped out of his truck and jogged to me and I instantly smeared his face into the tailgate and hit him so hard he gasped for air as he hit the ground.

Now. Your turn to share.

nerdgirl578's avatar

Well, i’m more of a lover not a fighter type. Although I have been known to occasionally shush people at the libraryif they speak to loud.

Mastema2's avatar

@nerdgirl578 I am terrified of you.

nerdgirl578's avatar

You better keep it down boy.

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