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How can I help someone searching for answers and beset by paralyzing indecision?

Asked by ETpro (34605points) November 10th, 2013

Someone whom I care about deeply is in the midst of what’s close to a nervous breakdown. Let’s call him X. X is generally a high functioning individual. But he is increasingly finding himself paralyzed by indecision. He told me that he’d decided to go to church today in hopes of finding some answers—some peace. He went on to say that the moment he decided to do that, he was beset by worries that the church he’d selected would be the wrong one. Thinking of going to some other church instead just led to the same self doubts about the new target. None of this indecision was thanks to me. I have never discussed my belief or lack thereof with my friend, X. And he’s experiencing the same paralyzing indecision about whether he’s working at the right job, and while working at it, whether each thing he decides to do is right or wrong.

So far, the only advice I have offered him is to look up on Google how to spot cult recruiters for what they are. I told him that cults routinely target people who are going through periods of self doubt and searching. They know how to spot the signs, and find such individuals easy targets for cult recruitment. The last thing X needs at this vulnerable moment is some evangelist for L. Ron Hubbard, A. C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada, or the Rev. Sun Myung Moon to latch onto him.

X says that it’s getting increasingly difficult for him to concentrate at work. He will go through half-day spells when he just zones out and is unable to get anything meaningful done. Is this something that demands a psychiatrist and medication, or can counseling or reading alone turn the tide for him? If reading will help, what should I suggest that he read? Bear in mind, I am an atheist. I do not want to suggest this or that church any more than I would suggest Scientologists, the Hare Krishnas, or the Moonies to step in and begin making decisions for him. How can I best help him get back to being his usual, high-performing self; and most important, how do I avoid doing harm?

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