What do you do when you have a freeloader in your life?

It’s hard to answer out of context of what the circumstances are. Maybe the person is a freeloader once in a while, but they share something else (their efforts, their service, whatever). Maybe the person doesn’t have much but they are very grateful for whatever you offer. In that case, I might not mind. It would all depend.

Maybe the person is greedy and pushy about it, in which case, it would be a different story. Maybe they expect you to give them something. Again, it all depends. What are we talking about? Something small? Something big? The circumstances could vary greatly and would affect my answer.

Thanks @jca I did not intend to provide context as through life I have had to witness and personally enable many instances of people genuinely needing help, finding themselves needing help because of piss poor planning and those that are just out and out sponges because they have learned how to use and abuse those who will give at all costs. Just looking for real life examples is all.

@Crazydawg: It sounds like you already have a bunch of real life examples.

I think it is up to your own determination. If you really like the person and they are going through a hard time, then treat them because you care for them and want to include them.
If they are, OTOH, always asking, and you feel annoyed, then it is up to you to pull back or be honest and tell them that their freeloading is starting to get old.
Nobody can freeload with a loader supplying them. lol

I have the opposite problem, I have had friends that forced stuff on me, gave me gifts, insisted on doing things that I did not need or want, it felt controlling and self aggrandizing, not friendly and it made me uncomfortable. Compulsive giving is just as bad a freeloading, both make others uncomfortable.
Nothing worse than someone that “gives” to you against your will then calls in the kindnesses later. I can’t stand compulsive helpers and givers, they are snakes in disguise just as freeloaders are leeches.

It’s a jungle out there. haha

I had a buddy for a while who asked to borrow money, promising that he would pay me back. The first time I let it go, the second time I eventually asked for half back, and the third time, I understood that I was giving him money. The fourth time, i said “no.” I was fascinated by his lack of embarrassment and ability to continue the myth of a “loan” with no self-consciousness or awkwardness.

@gailcalled I think that’s called being a charming sociopath. haha

@gailcalled: To me, you let him off the hook way too easily. He got the money and he avoided shame (and he probably still has you as a friend).

@Coloma and @jca: As our friendship grew, his behavior became more and more mercurial…he had clear bouts of depression and then manic episodes, but I was slow to catch on. He could, sometimes, be a good friend but more and more often, he wasn’t. So I finally walked away. On his good days, he was indeed charming, funny, extremely well-educated and interesting to talk with.