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xBRIANx's avatar

What is your experience with The Total Transformation Program?

Asked by xBRIANx (266points) November 19th, 2009

James Lehman, Behavior Therapist, came out with “The Total Transformation Program” and I wanted to know from those of you who have used it what your thoughts were. We have a 5 year old and are thinking about using it. They have a 30 day trial for $19 so it’s worth a shot.

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6 Answers

virtualist's avatar

Some parent reviews say it’s very complicated, difficult to use, not very effective, and basically, more of a retirement plan for James Lehman than a way to build a better relationship with your child or adolescent, and resolve any behavioral problems.

I guess there is also the “Honest Parenting” program.

I’m sorry you have to analyze these programs for your 5 yo . I’m sure others here will have more personal experience with each of these programs.

If necessary be careful about the 30 day deadline issues on any programs like this, so you don’t get ‘legally’ bound to owe more money than what you planned. Read all fine print carefully. Regards to you…

xBRIANx's avatar

@virtualist thanks for the response. We have been blessed with our wonderful, caring, intelligent 5 yr old. More than anything, he likes to debate and question everything. And of course, he “knows everything” because what 5yr old doesn’t? We just want to use some different strategies to control the backtalking and non-listening.

Thanks for the tip on the deadline for the 30 days. We’ll giv the program a shot, and if we feel it is not for us in the first 2 weeks, we’ll return it.

If anyone else had experiences with this, I’m all ears.

shilolo's avatar

I don’t have any experience with this program, but I’ve used the 1 2 3 Magic system to great effect with our toddler (it was recommended to us by our pediatrician). In a nutshell, you simply start counting when something bad is happening, and do it without anger. When you get to three, there is a consequence (typically a timeout, or whatever you deem is appropriate). So:

Son (screaming): NO. I don’t want to turn off the TV!
Me: Ok, that’s 1. Please turn off the TV.
Son (screaming): NO.
Me: Ok, that’s 2.
Son (screaming): NOOOOOO.
Me: OK. That’s 3. Time out…..

It is very simple, and in our house has worked really well. We don’t use it all the time (in fact, we hardly use it) because now even the threat of being “counted” is enough to disabuse my 3 year old son of his bad behavior. The important thing is that all caregivers (parents, grandparents, nannies, etc.) need to be on the same page, and sometimes to share in the “counting”. Also, this needs to be applied consistently and with discipline (i.e. no backing down), especially in the beginning. But, as I mentioned above, after a while it really is like “magic” in that either the threat or simply the initiation of counting “that’s 1” is enough to stop bad behavior.

avvooooooo's avatar

There are many things you can try before you get to a program designed for out of control teens. Even asking a question here about parenting techniques you could try would be a more positive step than trying this inappropriate (and ineffective) method of controlling your child’s behavior.

xBRIANx's avatar

@shilolo – we do the 1–2-3 thing do; just trying something new. @avvooooooo, you say that this program is for “out of control teens” although the programs claims it can help with behavior problems in children as young as 5 years old. You also state that this program is an “inappropriate (and ineffective) method of controlling your child’s behavior.” What is your experience, if any, with The Total Transformation Program? Why is it inappropriate?

avvooooooo's avatar

@xBRIANx Part of my college major was Child Development. Programs that endorse unsound parenting practices from the start are both inappropriate and ineffective. The program makes a lot of claims. But that’s just what they are and nothing more. There are many parenting practices that make a lot more sense. As I suggested, asking a question here on fluther would give you access to much experience and tried and true parenting practices.

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