Social Question

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

Hypothetically, if you were to get arrested, what would it be for?

Asked by Simone_De_Beauvoir (38980points) September 5th, 2010

We’ve been talking about eco monkey-wrenching lately and how we’d probably get arrested for screwing over some polluting company or other and I wondered what, if anything, my fellow flutherites would be most likely to get arrested for.

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50 Answers

cookieman's avatar

Excessive public cookie consumption.


Punching out some yahoo who makes a crack about my daughter being Asian.

TexasDude's avatar

Criminal levels of sexiness deemed by the EPA to be environmentally hazardous

Probably burning down a mountain or going vigilante on a rapist or some other type of scum.

Seek's avatar

Whatever it was, I didn’t do it.


Honestly, I am that boring. It will be a horrible case of wrong place at the right time. I tend to not do illegal things.

muppetish's avatar

Graffiti :)

Winters's avatar

If being an inconsiderate asshole were a crime, yeah, that’d probably be me. I guess the closest I could get for being an asshole is obstructing justice.

daytonamisticrip's avatar

If i went to jail it would either be because I broke a stupid law no one really knows about or

ucme's avatar

I’m going to go with the “bastard” up there.^^ In so much that any paedophile or racist sack of shit is going to get something like this! Arrested development? You betcha!

gggritso's avatar

Hmm. I think I have enough good sense to keep myself away from fraud, or anything like that. That said I’m kind of afraid that one day I’ll snap and upside-the-head someone with a monkey wrench. Twice.

Hopefully it’s a person who deserves it, but you never know. Serenity now!

Pied_Pfeffer's avatar

For still having the “W” sticker that a housemate put on my car bumper six years ago. That’s a crime, isn’t it? If anyone has suggestions on how to quickly and effectively remove it, please PM me.

daytonamisticrip's avatar

@Pied_Pfeffer I don’t feel like pm-ing you, take a paint scrapper to it

Seek's avatar

@Pied_Pfeffer Goo Gone. Anyone with a toddler needs to own stock in that company.

wundayatta's avatar

Tax fraud. Or speeding. Maybe some kind of civil resistance, but there doesn’t seem to be as much urgency about that as there was when I was growing up.

Frankie's avatar

My friends and I played this game once. They decided that if I got arrested for something, it would be mouthing off to/verbally harassing a police officer while drunk. Which I could totally see happening if said officer was arresting or harassing one of my friends.

ANef_is_Enuf's avatar

… no comment. ;)

It appears that I am the only jelly to have ever truly misbehaved..haha.

Seaofclouds's avatar

It would probably be assult after someone did something to my son that I didn’t like. I once had to restrain myself from going after my sister-in-laws grandfather after he put his hands on my son. He’s just lucky he didn’t hurt my son and that my brother stepped in before I did.

Facade's avatar

The use of psychedelics

Coloma's avatar

Printing bills in the basement. Okay….barn. lol

Yep, my crime of choice if I was to cross over to the dark side. ;-)

Worst case scenario, a Martha Stewart stint, I could do it.

Library, computer, workout room, cooking classes, and, would take care of my retirement worries. haha

nebule's avatar

Grievous Bodily Harm… Because I’ve never stood up to anyone and punched them for attacking me and I know it’s only a matter of time before someone physically attacks me and I finally crack and choose to fight back

aprilsimnel's avatar

Probably because I was protesting where TPTB would rather I didn’t.

Austinlad's avatar

Removing the tag on my pillow.

jazmina88's avatar

the 80s…, drugs, rock n roll

Coloma's avatar


Hahahaha…wow…you are a daring guy, do you flip your mattress every week too? lol

aprilsimnel's avatar

@Pied_Pfeffer – The Powers That Be

harple's avatar

It would be for something that someone else did, but that I knew they would not be able to deal with the sentence for… I put other people first way too much, lol

Ben_Dover's avatar

I plead the Fifth…

bippee's avatar

Stalking Mike Ness—because I love him.—

Akua's avatar

@TheOnlyNeffie your not the only one. I was arrested in 2007 and spent one night in jail before the charges were dropped.
Some laws are stupid and since they don’t protect me and mine then following them don’t apply to me either. If I get arrested again it would be because someone harmed my daughter in some way. I would do serious bodily harm protecting her. It’s my worst fear… knowing how out of control I could get over her.

Dr_Lawrence's avatar

For some act of civil disobedience protesting some abuse of those with no voice (not referring to mutes).

Austinlad's avatar

@Coloma, indeed I flip—not weekly, but regularly. I constantly worry about a knock on the door by the Mattress Coppers.

buster's avatar

I have been arrested seven times for drug related charges. If I were to be arrested again it would probably be for peeing dirty for probation or a marijuana charge.

Mom2BDec2010's avatar

The cop would probably ask me a simple question and I’d get mad, have a mood swing and piss them off, and they’d make up a reason to arrest me.

Ben_Dover's avatar

“Working like I don’t need money, Loving like I’ve never been hurt, And dancing like no one’s watching.”

ANef_is_Enuf's avatar

“Dancing like no one’s watching” might get me arrested for public indecency. And not in a good way.

Ben_Dover's avatar

@Akua Nicely played!
@TheOnlyNeffie I have never heard of being arrested in a good way!

YARNLADY's avatar

Once, in the 1960’s I was almost arrested for being part of a group of women who wore pantsuits to work to protest the discrimination against women. In January 1995, the California legislature actually gave women the right to wear pants at work. Your tax dollars at work…

mYcHeMiCaLrOmAnCe's avatar

for killing some people. or maybe for stalking gerard way because I’m crazy about him. or just crazy.

Coloma's avatar


I just watched a great documentary the other night, ‘Berkeley in the 60’s’.

Awesome archival footage of the students movement for civil rights, free speech and womens rights.

Seaminglysew's avatar

I would be arrested for dancing in the streets with my best friend. Others might say for getting sassy with the cop! (Nooooo, not me!”

Nially_Bob's avatar

I wasn’t too sure how to answer this question myself so went into the other room and asked some friends to which I received a unanimous and simultaneous reply of “public indecency”. I think I may be giving people the wrong impression.

Frenchfry's avatar

I would get arrested for public intoxication and/or peeing in public. When I have to pee . I have to pee. LOL I have have peed behind a bush before.

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

Gadzooks, If I were to be busted it would be for a Ponzi scheme or murder.

Nicole8's avatar

Being under the influence of alcohol in public.

bob_'s avatar

I did not sleep with that woman, Ms. Lewinsky.

FutureMemory's avatar

Serial hugging.

Nially_Bob's avatar

I’ll see you behind a smooth non-huggable surface for your crimes @FutureMemory!

FutureMemory's avatar

@Nially_Bob Some laws were meant to be broken.

eden2eve's avatar

Mixing it up with someone I caught abusing a weaker or innocent person or animal. Those are the only times when my temper has overwhelmed my prudence.

flutherother's avatar

I was cycling back home from class a couple of years ago in Mobile Alabama when I came upon sections of metal fencing strung out along the road. I looked up and I looked down and I could see no reason for this freakish obstacle. It wasn’t very high and so I swung my bicycle over the fence and then clambered over myself.

I then heard a stentorian voice coming from a nearby bullhorn warning me not to proceed any further and to step back from the fence. It was Alabama’s finest fully armed and not in a good mood. I was hoping to get a green card at that time and so I didn’t want to argue. Not that it would have been a good idea anyway. I said I would take the long way round, through Langan Park, which I did.

I never did find out the reason for the barrier and I suspect that if my skin had been of a darker hue I might still be languishing in an Alabama gaol. It was weird and discomfiting and not at all the way police in the UK would have dealt with the matter. Travelling by bicycle, or even worse walking, are almost felonies in themselves in Alabama so it is probably just as well that I never did get my green card.

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