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Pandora's avatar

Do you feel raising only boys or girls has or can change your view of the world?

Asked by Pandora (29495points) September 28th, 2010

My mom use to say with boys you worry about them getting in fights or ending up in jail and with girls you worry about them getting raped or knocked up.
I have a friend who seems bitter towards men and she has raised only girls. She seems to think everything with men is black and white. I sometimes wonder if her bitterness comes from her personal relationships or is it from raising only girls.
I wonder because I have raised both a boy and a girl and before having children my thoughts about male behavior were one sided. Having raised a male, I realized that everything isn’t black and white about males or females.

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6 Answers

Pandora's avatar

I meant to say changed your view of the opposite sex. Sorry it is late and I’m tired. Always think of questions beore going to bed after being blank all day.

wundayatta's avatar

I think it is common for any woman who has been treated badly by boys or men to dislike all men. It doesn’t matter whether one comes from a mixed family or not. In fact, I’d think that it might be more likely for a girl with an opposite sex sibling to feel bad about men. In a single sex family, you couldn’t be harassed or abused by a brother.

Why did you feel badly about males before you gave birth to one?

Pandora's avatar

@wundayatta No. I grew up with 3 brothers and although I thought them all jerks, my youngest brother and I are best friends still. I just never really saw the sensitive side to guys till I myself was mature enough to notice how boys show their feelings differently but still share the same feelings. And at the time I didn’t understand how boys may feel compelled to hide their feelings more out of fear than because they are jerks or how growing up in a male society they may say the opposite of how they felt so as not to show weakness.
It wasn’t till I raised a boy into a man, that I got to see how men develop. With my siblings I was simply growing up with them so neither one of us were mature enough to take notice of the things we said and did as time goes by. As an observer, things become clearer. Heck, I didn’t get along with girls either or my sister. So as far as that goes the same applied to both sexes.
Raising my daughter also gave me some insite on women as well.
But I wonder. If I never raised children, would I have never gained a fresh new perspective on either of the sexes?

Neizvestnaya's avatar

I always wanted to have and raise boys in order to see if I could put a couple of amazing ones out there, the kind I know I and a lot of my friends would love to meet and share a life with.

Pandora's avatar

@Neizvestnaya It would’ve never worked. I think both my kids are amazing but although I did the best I could to raise perfect children, they each came along with their own unique personality. I don’t believe anyone can successfully raise a Stepford child.
Who wants perfect anyway. Unique is so much more interesting and real.

Neizvestnaya's avatar

@Pandora: I realize that and wouldn’t expect perfect, I don’t believe in perfect and have never met a live Stepford child. I have met some amazing children and young adults though, my hope was my own would’ve been among them.

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