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Gingerlaurie's avatar

What do you think is the solution for bullying in the workplace/school/online?

Asked by Gingerlaurie (356 points ) September 28th, 2011

We’ve all been affected, or are close to someone who has experienced it. What programs are you aware of that are making a difference? What should be implemented? And what would be your advice to a child/adult/colleague that is being bullied?

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15 Answers

GabrielsLamb's avatar

I have always been bullied and therefore I have always quit. I have lost some excellent jobs like that working with some brilliant lovely people because I couldn’t find a diplomatic enough way to be me… tactfully. It is one of the deepest regrets in my life. I should be on the top of the world in my career right now and I am on the bottom rung.

LuckyGuy's avatar

I would so much like to see the bullied team up and totally destroy the bully with swift and awesome power. Three weak kids can take down the biggest brute by having one kneel behind him having another push him back and a third pound him with a baseball bat in one instant. But in our “civilized” world that will not happen. It takes commitment and planning. (oh and it is wrong, too,. right?)
The same approach can happen at work. You just need to adjust the tactics. But first you need to find two others who are bullied. Seek them out and go to lunch together.

wonderingwhy's avatar

Teach and motivate people to be compassionate, humble, tolerant, and engaged with the needs of others over their own and reward those who promote through action such values in society. (I’m not talking about “sensitivity training” here either, I mean fundamental moral focus.)

I don’t know any other way to break the cycle of greed and entitlement that perpetuates such actions. Unfortunately I don’t really see that happening.

It’s hard to give advice on how to handle it as each person and situation is different; report it, stand up to it, ignore it, ask for advice from someone more closely involved in the situation, involve others.

Coloma's avatar

I no longer feel the need to ‘educate’ or ‘enlighten’ anyone.
If I find myself in a less than savory situation with highly dysfunctional types I will either speak up, change the situation or leave. Usually I opt for leaving these days.

I no longer feel I can influence a rattlesnake into becoming a kitten.
I respect the nature of the snake and get the hell out of striking range. lol

Ela's avatar

Empathy.

Joker94's avatar

Well, anti-bully sentiments were preached in early gradeschool, which I think helped. Reinforcing the idea that bullying is wrong at an early age is infinitely more beneficial than trying to preach these values to older kids. For example, there is an anti-bullying program now in place at my highschool. But in all honesty, there isn’t really a bullying problem in my highschool to begin with. Granted, when there is an instance in which it occurs, it’s always horrible.

The school trying to crack down on bullying is a noble intention, but it seems laughable and downright juvenile to most of the students. I can’t help but think that maybe programs like these are better suited for kids in grade/middle school, where the bulk of bullying goes on. Teaching tolerance and empathy to kids at that age would probably yield better results. Oh, and actually reprimanding the aggressor is a step in the right direction. If someone is “bullied” in highschool, the protocol for teachers is to apologize to the student for the bullying. Which I, and most of the other teachers, think is ridiculous. Calling attention to a total douche isn’t negative. Hell, it’s practically necessary.

As for kids who get bullied, my advice is this; Stay true to yourself, and don’t think for even a moment that the words they say are true. Tell a teacher, tell a friend, but don’t bottle up what happened inside. Years from now, you’ll be a much better person for moving yourself through it, while the majority of kids who picked on you won’t have changed a bit. Except by then, they’ll be into drugs.

GabrielsLamb's avatar

@worriedguy People tend to kiss ass on bullies to keep them distracted, I have tried it, they almost always rather than banning together, throw one under the bus as a sacrifice to get on the bullies good side. People are sell out’s when it comes to personal safety and success. I suppose that is another of my problems, I don’t think that way.

Coloma's avatar

@GabrielsLamb

Good for you! Sell out translates to hypocrite. Better to walk alone than in the company of fools. ;-)

Hibernate's avatar

Well every time someone bullies others it’s a sign he suffered some emotional trauma him/her self.

GabrielsLamb's avatar

@Coloma Better to have a job I think no? But it’s difficult for me to hypothetically *Of course… cut someone else’s throat when all you really just want is to do your job. I don’t know why people have to make a competition out of EVERYTHING. Some people don’t care and just take things because they can.

GabrielsLamb's avatar

@Hibernate Very true, I have been on both sides of that coin at different times, in my case however it is usually defense, I almost do not ever start issues. I am unfortunately very bad at finishing tactfully.

Coloma's avatar

@GabrielsLamb

You just have to be true to yourself, and sometimes that means walking away empty handed.
Let the barracudas eat themselves alive, and they will, sooner or later. haha

I’m not a competitive type,so I don’t relate to cut throats at all. :-)

GabrielsLamb's avatar

@Coloma I agree, and Thanks ♥

ucme's avatar

Guillotine? I mean, I don’t want to be accused of losing my head over this, but…....;¬}

Hibernate's avatar

@GabrielsLamb well you need some practice and eventually you’ll get out of them with no harm caused to you.

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