When you are cleaning up after a huge meal would you prefer your guests help in the kitchen?

It depends.. If I know the guests very well, then I’m sure they know me well enough to know how I want it done, so I’d force them to get off their asses and help me.
On the other hand, if I don’t know the guests very well, I’d find it rude if they don’t offer their help. But if they do offer their help, I’d still deny it because I’d prefer to have it done my way, although it was a nice gesture. Added to the fact that they didn’t expect to come to my house and help me clean up. So what I basically expect is manners from the guests rather than actually wanting help. Although it’s useful if needed.

My kitchen is teeny-weeny producing a large holiday meal can be a challenge so there’s not really room for anyone to help, but I love it when people will chat with me from the doorway, and make sure my wine glass doesn’t dry out. My group is always lovely about making sure that we all are happy.

I’d rather my guests leave the cleanup to me at a later time. Helping clearing the table to the kitchen is more than enough.

I like it when friends help clear the table but not when they want to put leftovers away and start asking you for appropriate Tupperware sizes. That usually doesn’t help.

I don’t want anyone to help me, because then I end up having twice the amount of work. I’ve usually planned out my cleanup stragegy, even before the guests have arrived. I’ve got my tupperware and the ziplock bags ready, I’ve cleared out sections of the fridge and freezer, I’ve got dish towels and paper towels laid out and ready to go. I’ve got plenty of 409 and dishwashing soap and wet wipes and I’ve cleared out the dishwasher and cleaned out the sink and I have a big empty trash can, so I’m ready to go, the second the last piece of food has been swallowed. I just let everyone retire to the living room, while I discreetly start scraping plates, stacking dirty dishes (for later easy access) etc. I pop in and out of the kitchen to the living room to see if I can get anyone anything else, but I’m actually cleaning as I go a long.

I am not one of those people that can take a chance on letting leftovers sit out on the counter, or let dirty dishes fester, or let sticky counters get stickier.

Whether it is my house or someone else’s house; I am always chided for cleaning up too soon after a meal. I can’t relax until everything is in order. I like help in the kitchen – to a point. Like @Kardamom, I’ve got my cleanup strategy laid out and I clean as I cook. Also, like @janbb, I like help to clear the table.

We had friends over last night. I told them to make themselves at home. This morning my friend was clearing the table and I told her to sit down and I’d clear the table. She smiled and said, “You said to make myself at home. This is what I’d do at home. Please, let me help.” I love her. I let her help.

@Kardamom you are officially my clean-up hero! I would never in a million years be able to prepare a clean-up strategy. As I read your response I was picturing it and I really wish my mind worked that way.

I like to take care of it myself. If company helps, I feel like I am a poor host.

I prefer to do it myself for the most part as I like it done my way. Having said that, I’m sure I’d like an offer of help as some sign of gratitude.

I like it when guests help.. That way everyone feels they are contributing and I am not missing out on the conversation.

For the cooking, if you’re in the way, drying out my meat, burning my rolls, or breaking my sauce, you’re like to get stabbed.

For the cleaning, everyone’s invited. Better still if I can find enough willing suckers friends and relatives to not be needed! And I’m not above offering bribes of wine, scotch, and choice leftovers to get them!

Gosh, @Kardamom , my clean up strategy is basically compressing stuff that’s already in the fridge to make room for new stuff. I manage to get everything done, but it’s always kind of interesting as to how.

No, not at all. Not that I don’t appreciate the offer to help, but my kitchen is TINY. I need space, or no one is getting any cleaning done.

This is a great question, because I always wonder this when I go to someone else’s house, even if it’s not for a big meal. I’m never sure if they mind me helping or if it’s insulting/annoying to them. I never try to help cooking, but I’ll lurk around trying to help do dishes or clean off the table.

It depends. If I have company (a couple or a few people) I’d rather spend my time enjoying them and then clean up later after I’m on my own.

If I have 8 or more people, I’d rather have the help.

Just a bit of a help, a gracious showing of appreciation, like bringing the plates over at the counter. Or the sexy female guests ages 24–90 patting my behind…something like that. Lol.

Our kitchen is small but our weather temperate, so we make the most out of grilling and entertaining outdoors most of the year. I try to plan meals/decorations accordingly to the amount of guests. I’d rather serve one new dish that took work and I’m proud of with packaged rolls than a meal made entirely from scratch that uses every pot and pan and I’m stressing if guests peer in the kitchen.
If someone wants to offer help clearing plates and washing dishes that’s fine and I’ll assign even one simple task and be thankful. Some of the best conversations do happen in the kitchen or while everyone is relaxed!

@JilltheTooth I know right! I am lucky to get the door to the fridge closed after putting everything away!

It’s complicated. I am a control freak, so I prefer to do the cleanup myself. On the other hand, I enjoy the “let’s all be in the kitchen, talking and laughing while getting things cleaned up” scenario. On the third hand (thankfully, we jellies have plenty of tentacles to go around), there are some friends who I specifically do not want doing the washing up. You know, those people who only wash the tops of things! And on the fourth hand, I would never let any of that stuff keep me from appreciating a kind offer, or accepting it if it looks like the person might be hurt by my saying no.

My SIL and I started a tradition years ago…when you come to my house don’t even offer to do dishes, because when I come to your house I’ll do the same. I like for my guests to enjoy themselves when they come to my house and that does not entail any kind of clean-up. Eat, drink, be merry.

@SuperMouse I developed my strategy out of neccesity many years ago. I do a lot of house sitting so I often have to rush out of my house (or my relatives’s homes) to go back to wherevever I’m house sitting, so I’ve learned to Git ‘er done!

My Mom and Grandmother used to end up doing most of the cleanup all by themselves (I feel bad looking back upon my lazy childhood self) so since I’ve been an adult, I’ve tried to be as useful as possible at my own house (and not let my Mom have to do all of the work) and when I go to other relative’s homes (some of whom would be perfectly happy to let leftovers sit out overnight, which makes me cringe at the thought of it LOL)

Also, my Dad and a couple of my relatives have compromised immune systems, due to a host of health situations, so I’ve learned to take food safety very seriously. Also, I think I sort of have a slight case of OCD when it comes to germiphobia (so I’ve got a bit of a compulsion to keep the kitchen clean, however the clutter in my room is a whole ‘nother matter, apparently I ain’t got no compulsions there!)

A lot of my stragegies have come from listening to this fantastic cooking show host named Melinda Lee. She does a radio show out of Los Angeles, but you can listen online or check out her website. Anyway, her show is on in the late mornings on Saturdays and Sundays and I listen to her all the time. She used to be a caterer and she’s always talking to callers about how to plan, set up and clean up after parties. That’s where I got most of my ideas.

Here’s some tips on how to prepare to clean up after a party.

Before you even start to cook anything, decide what you want to make and how casual or formal you want to go. That way you can decide whether to bust out the good china (that can’t be washed in the dishwasher) your every day dinnerware, or nice paper or plastic plates. Of course this will all depend upon who’s coming and what kind of party it is.

Then, after you’ve decided upon a menu and you’ve got all of your ingredients for cooking, do a little bit of work in your freezer and fridge, to get rid of any stuff you really don’t need to keep (rotting leftovers, almost empty bottles of jelly and olives and pickles, soda and juice bottles) You need to get some of that stuff out of there, because you’ll need space to put your leftovers. For food safety purposes, you shouldn’t leave food sitting out for more than 2 hours.

Because you don’t want to leave your food sitting out, you need to plan, in advance what kinds of containers you will need. I have tons of tupperware and corningware and ziplock bags, but I often get some of these foil containers with lids if I know I’ll be sending leftovers home with my guests, and plenty of plastic bags to stack their containers. I have that stuff set out and ready to go in my laundry room (so it’s out of site to the guests, but easily retrieved in a hurry).

I also make sure, before I even start cooking, that I have plenty of Simple Green or 409 and a big cylinder of Wet Wipes and clean hand towels and paper towels and plenty of dishwashing soap and dishwasher detergent and extra garbage bags. I keep that stuff out of sight too, until I’m ready to use it.

Then I make sure that my kitchen trash can has been emptied before my guests arrive. I’m going to need that to quickly scrape bones and chunks of fat off the plates before I rinse and stack them. I might not wash the dishes immediately (sometimes I wait until the guests have gone home) but I always scrape and rinse and stack them together on the counter, so that when I’m ready to wash them by hand (if it’s the fancy stuff) or load them into the dishwasher, it’s an easy, quick task. I usually fill a big bowl with soapy water and set that in my sink, to soak the cutlery as I’m clearing the table (keeps the sink clean, so when I need to wash dishes, it’s not all grimey and greasy). Then I dump the ice out of the glasses, or remove any straws and set all of the glasses on another section of the counter, awaiting washing or dishwasher loading. I’ve found that if, while you are clearing, you are also dumping and scraping and separating out the cutlery from the plates from the glasses, it makes washing and loading the dishwasher a lot faster, after your guests have left.

While I’m clearing the table, I will also be putting leftovers into tupperware and corningware and ziplock bags and putting that stuff into the fridge as soon as possible. If people want more later, you can always bust out the containers again. Plus you’ll need to take those containers out later, when you’re doling out the leftovers for people to take home. Unless you have the ability to pack those containers while you’re clearing and sorting (for me, that’s actually easier). I also have a sharpie pen on hand, when I’m packing up the foil containers with lids, so I can write people’s names on them, or list the contents. You don’t want your vegetarian niece ending up with a turkey leg, or your old Uncle Harry getting only Brussels sprouts LOL.

Inevitably, the guests will wander in the kitchen and want to help. But that usually means that they’ll start dumping bones and fat and grease into your sink and setting your nice wine glasses onto plates still filled with gravy (Oh the Horror, the Horror!) I usually shoo them out and tell them to sit and enjoy themselves and that I’ll be back in in a minute. At that point, I usually put the kettle on and fire up the coffee machine (that has already had coffee put into the filter compartment and water put in the carafe before dinner was even served) The coffee cups and desert plates were set aside, also in the laundry room, to make them accessible, but out of site.

Once all of the food has been put in the fridge, I’ll serve the coffee and tea and desserts. Then I’ll pop back into the kitchen and clean off a section of the counter with a wet wipe and then I’ll lay down a couple of clean towels, in preparation for the dishwashing and drying party that me and my Mom will be having 2 seconds after the last guest has gone home. After everyone’s finished with coffee and dessert and conversation and it’s time for our guests to go home. I’ll pull out the pre-labeled leftover containers, load them into plastic bags for everyone and bid them adieu.

Knowing full well that my Dad will be ready for another piece of pie by that time. I will have anticipated this and already sliced him a piece of pie, so that he need not venture into the inner sanctum of the kitchen where he would tend to mill around and not know what else to do, except stand in the way. So Dad gets shooe’d out with his 2nd piece of pie.

Then, while re-runs of Two and Half Men play gently in the background, me and my Mom quickly load the dishwasher and turn it on, wash and dry all of the fancy wine glasses, wash the big pots that are too big to fit into the dishwasher and let those air dry overnight on top of the towels that we laid down on the counter, then we’ll wipe down the counters and the tables and throw the cloth napkins and placemants into the washing machine. Then Mom heads upstairs to go to watch the news with my Dad and I usually hop into the car and head off into the night, to rejoin the dog or cat that I’m babysitting, while my client/friend is off in another city not cleaning up anything.

Happy Holidays to All and to All a Goodnight : )

I prefer they bring the dishes to the kitchen and hand them to me. There isn’t room in my kitchen for very many people. This year, I brought some containers out to the table for the food that was left over and my (adult) grandsons put the food in them while I was organizing other things.

One of my champagne glasses broke while I was washing them, and I’m glad it was me rather than anyone else. Luckily only one piece broke off, and it fell into the basin.

@YARNLADY I also broke a glass yesterday. I hope you didn’t get cut, I didn’t. Did you make any pies?

@Kardamom No, I didn’t get cut, the piece that broke off was three inches away from my hand, and fell into the sink.

I don’t make pies because it’s too much work, and they never come out right. I bought two pies, but the main desert was a delicious fruit salad my Son’s Mother-in-law makes. The favorite at our house was the watermelon I bought the day before.

@Kardamom, that is awesome! Now I really wish I had asked this question before Thanksgiving. I am looking forward to hosting a dinner party soon so I can try all these ideas!

@SuperMouse One of the easiest things to do, to make things more useful to you is to make a Microsoft Word document with boxes to check off.

First, me and my Mom make a menu list. Then we make a list with all of the things that we will need for the prep and presentation: how many guests, how many plates do we have and how much stuff do we need to borrow, how much room do we need, do we need to rent/borrow any items such as extra tables or chairs or extra dishes and glasses. Do we have enough equipment/storage containers to make and store all of the food that we plan to make? If not, buy or borrow what you need (from ziplock bags, to crockpots, to paper plates).

Make a list of things that need to be done in your home. From cleaning out your fridge and freezer, to adding leaves to your table, to cleaning your glasses (again) to finding out whether you need to provide any menu items that are vegetarian, allergin-free or fit into any specific dietary requirement (low fat, suitable for diabetics, child-friendly foods, suitable for vegetarians, etc.)

Do you have everything you need? Do you need extas of anything from dishes, chairs, coasters, cutlery, glasses, serving dishes, storage containers, trash cans & trash bags, napkins, cleaning supplies?

Then make out a plan (that will and can be altered as the situation changes) that regards how you will plan out each step of the program (with alternate solutions in place in case things don’t go according to the original plan). It’s always good to have a plan A and B and even a C in case things don’t go the way you had originally planned.

Then concentrate on getting as many of your dishes prepped ahead of time, getting your cleaning and prep done ahead of time, and have a few contingency plans in place, just in case things dont’ go according to plan.

Make lots of lists, plan out things ahead of time, and make sure that you consider all sorts of things that you might not have considered before (such as guests with allergies, dietary concerns, disabilities and other medical situations) sanitary concerns, quantities, storage containers and space etc.

The more planning ahead that you do, the better off you will be. Making lists makes it much easier to keep track of everything you need to do (and what tasks you can delegate to other people). In the end, you have to have the sensibility and sense of humor to do what you can, and not worry too much if everthing goes wrong. Most of these people will be your friends and relatives anyway, so it’s not like they’re going to give you a bad review in Bon Appetite.

It depends on who the guests are. Family, yes, they should help. It’s an unspoken rule that the women all help clean up after family dinners. The men get to sit around on their butts, but who really wants them fumbling around in the kitchen anyway? ;) I really appreciate the help. My husband’s mom and aunts have cleaning up after a big family event down to a science (very much like @Kardamom described above).

If the guests are friends of ours or people we aren’t as close to, I’m more likely to decline help.

I would want my guests to wash the dishes, and put them down exactly where I want to. I would love to lead them and just sit there, bossing around. Haha! But that’s never gonna happen.