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ibstubro's avatar

What's your favorite Groucho Marx quote?

Asked by ibstubro (11290 points ) March 10th, 2014

Follow-up on my ‘favorite Mark Twain quote’ question. I think between the two of them, they probably had a quip for every situation.

Amazing that an individual can make so many statements in their lifetime that ring true for so long. Incredible minds.

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11 Answers

kritiper's avatar

To a man who had many children who was on his show, You Bet Your Life, “See this cigar? Sometimes I take it out.”

Pachy's avatar

One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got into my pajamas I’ll never know.

Winter_Pariah's avatar

Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies.

ETpro's avatar

Anyone who says he can see through a woman is missing a lot.

GloPro's avatar

@kritiper Great minds think alike! I thought the quote was in response to the woman saying she loved children. It was “Well, ma’am, I love my cigar, too, but I take it out once in awhile.”

LostInParadise's avatar

Here is one that was referenced by Woody Allen. I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member,

syz's avatar

“Outside of a dog, a book is man’s best friend. Inside of a dog, it’s too dark to read.”

CWOTUS's avatar

“Those are my principles, and if you don’t like them… well, I have others.”

kritiper's avatar

@GloPro Maybe he used that line more than once.

GloPro's avatar

Here’s the version I’ve heard. It varies anywhere from 11 to 20 children, but the punch line is pretty much the same.
Apparently it cannot be confirmed as a true story, as it was deemed to risqué and the tape was edited. There is no film proof.

ibstubro's avatar

@Winter_Pariah‘s was totally new to me, and gave me a good laugh. I think the rest of them I had heard, but it was good to get a chuckle. Thanks to all who posted!

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