For a "real" first date how important do you think it is for the guy to actually call the girl and ask as opposed to a text or online chat?

Call her.

I would get her on the phone for a while and see how that goes before you take her out on a date. Talking on the phone is much more intimate then just texting or talking online, and it kicks the relationship up a notch. You’ll get to learn more about her.

Just call her up and see how it goes. If you’re still hitting it off after a few days, ask her out.

your profile says you are almost thirty years old. Leave the textual flirting to the teenagers, and call her.

Call….......CALL!!! Unless you are in high school or let’s say college….please call!!!!!!!!!!

Of course, this is coming from someone that hates texting. I can’t standing it! I feel like I should be asking to buy a vowel…or I’m playing hangman and am filling in the blanks.

CALL. OR, even consider the face-to-face, version. Actually asking in person!

Call her. Agreeing with @peyton_farquhar, the whole asking someone out via text message is pretty middle school. If you want to turn things up a notch, pick up the phone and call her. Otherwise, it’s just too casual.

@everyone : THANKS! I have always planned on calling her, I just needed some reassurance because Im kind of shy when it comes to this stuff and its much easier getting shot down when you are not looking at that person or talking to them directly.

Very. Call the girl.
<—Girl speaking.

@tennessejac – good luck!! :) (have confidence, but don’t be cocky, when you ask!!)

Listen to SuperMouse’s super advice.

For a first date I’d definitely call. After you’re already established as a couple it can sometimes be ok to text a request for a date, but there ought to be a damned good reason to. I’m married and even my fella has to have a good reason to text, but something like “running late, still in meeting, see you in 15” is ok. Good luck and let us know how it goes.

@cak: lurve for “buy a vowel”. :^> I hate those sorts of texts, too.

@cyndyh – thank you! :)

I agree with everyone—definitely call her.

Just thought i would add that i don’t think you should think of yourself as shy… you’ve certainly come out of your shell on Fluther in the past week or so that I’ve known you. Having said that… I’m quite a shy person and I’m constantly worried about what I’m going to say to people if i have to phone them…or god forbid…actually go on a date with someone… even female friends scare me sometimes…:-/

I do find though that if i really stop worrying about it and live in the moment and really just be myself things generally go OK… Sure i say some stupid things occasionally but its better being honest and being ME than spending all my time worrying about it.

Call her of course and i’m sure you’ll know pretty quickly whether you’ll hit it off and if she’s “into you”...

there she goes again with bloody air quotes!!! tut tut

Call!

I’m a girl around your age, and I’m a big texter. Calling would really set you apart, in a good way. Calling instead of texting says you’re mature, you actually want to spend time on getting to know her, and you have manners. Girls like those things. :)

call. make it personal. make the effort. Every girl deserves the effort.