General Question

DrasticDreamer's avatar

What do I wear to a wedding?

Asked by DrasticDreamer (19306 points ) May 2nd, 2009

I’m attending a wedding tomorrow, but the thing is, I don’t know if I have anything appropriate to wear. People keep telling me that I should wear a dress or a skirt, but the things is…. I don’t own either.

Should I go out and buy an outfit? Or would some dressy pants and a shirt be okay?

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36 Answers

YARNLADY's avatar

Tomorrow is very short notice. If you want a dress, go to the charity thrift shop such as Salvation Army and get one for around $5. Otherwise, just wear a dressy pant suit. I doubt there is a rule that you must wear a dress.

DesireeCassandra's avatar

I think if you wear the right shirt, you will be fine with nice dress pants. Just remember to accessorize! But not too flashy.

Kelly27's avatar

YAY! I thought I was the only girl that didn’t own a skirt or dress. :)

Dorkgirl's avatar

Anyone you know have something you could borrow? Sister, roomie, friend?
If not, then wear something nice, your best pants and a nice top or sweater. If you only own jeans, then wear your best pair with heels (if possible) to dress them up and a pretty top. As @DesireeCassandra says, accessorize what you have to make it a little dressier.
Be respectful of the couple and the occasion.
If you were getting married would you be concerned if one of your friends showed up a little casual or did not show up at all because they did not have the “right clothes”?

DrasticDreamer's avatar

@Kelly27 I know, we’re rare! :)

@Dorkgirl I don’t think anyone has something I can borrow, but I do have some nice pants, shirts and sweaters, so I’ll stick with those. I’m not used to wearing dresses or skirts, so I’d probably be uncomfortable doing so.

You’re right, too. I’d definitely want people to show up, regardless of what kind of clothes they were wearing. These are more acquaintances than friends, so I just wasn’t sure if they had expectations or not. Ah, well… I don’t think they’ll care. Thanks! :)

Dorkgirl's avatar

@DrasticDreamer—what is the venue? Is it a fancy restaurant or country club? That would influence how dressy I got, too.
If the setting is more casual, then I’d choose clothes that seem to suit that venue.
Good luck!

DrasticDreamer's avatar

@Dorkgirl It’s a country club.

Dorkgirl's avatar

A little dressier, then.

DrasticDreamer's avatar

Okay, thank you. :)

Jeruba's avatar

Do you have a nice jacket?

Is it a day or evening wedding?

DrasticDreamer's avatar

@Jeruba It’s during the day – about two o’clock. I have some jackets, but none of which I think are dressy enough. I may have to go out and buy at least one piece if I want to look completely put together.

Jeruba's avatar

Better get going, then! If you have, say, a nice pastel jacket and a dressy ivory blouse, I think you’d be fine with some charcoal or navy pants.

DrasticDreamer's avatar

Yeah, I think I’ll head to the store in a little bit. I actually do have a very light tan jacket and some creamy (off-white) nice sweaters. I was thinking that I could wear them with a nice pair of brown dress pants that I have. What do you think? Pretty neutral, but sophisticated.

Jeruba's avatar

That sounds very appropriate to me.

Dorkgirl's avatar

@DrasticDreamer that sounds like a nice combo. Simple & sophisticated.
You need to feel comfortable/confident, too.

DrasticDreamer's avatar

Thank you, guys. :) The only thing I need to get is a pair of shoes, because I don’t know if I have any that will work.

Have to go for now – sudden, severe thunder and lighting. But thank you again! :)

Jeruba's avatar

Nice brown leather pumps with a low heel should do.

gailcalled's avatar

Earrings and a nice scarf do wonders. Jeans and sneakers are a no-no, but if you have a comfortable pair of sandals and your slacks cover part of them, no one will notice. I think back on recent functions that I have attended and can’t remember what others were wearing unless it was totally inappropriate. (I went to a memorial service six months ago, and a cousin got up to speak ex temp. He was wearing camouflage gear. That I remember.)

justwannaknow's avatar

Wear what you feel compfortable in. They know you and how you dress. They still invited you. I doubt they want you to be someone you are not. Go as yourself and have fun just wear SOMETHING.

gailcalled's avatar

@justwannaknow: What if DD is, indeed, a closet nudist? Weddings are a celebration and that includes making an effort on all fronts.

figbash's avatar

Do you have an H&M near you?

You could get a great, inexpensive, dressy top and a nice caridigan to go with it, really inexpensively. If you’re normally not a dress girl but are feeling like sometimes you _should_wear one, go for a shirt dress – which looks just like a really long version of a button down and can be really dressed up with the right jewelry!

Jeruba's avatar

Gail is right. When you attend a special event, you are part of the occasion for everyone else, and your manner of dress is a statement of how you feel about it. Comfort is not at the top of the list of considerations; courtesy and respect and a sense of the occasion are. If you care about the people involved, as well as your own reputation, you don’t use your attire to express contempt, disdain, or indifference. If those are your feelings, you don’t go.

charliecompany34's avatar

depending on where the wedding is, these days you can just about wear whatever you want to wear. i’ve been to weddings where suits and dresses were in order, but you also saw casual in the same church or place of matrimony.

the bride and groom, in my opinion, dont really care what you wear. today, wearing the “right thing” is only about wedding etiquette for the onlooker. you can show up in bermuda shorts and a Hawaiian shirt if you want to.

the wedding is all about the bride and groom and the bridal party. how you dress is moot.

chyna's avatar

Let me tell you what not to wear: My 6 foot tall sister in law wore an electric blue glitter mini dress with white fishnet hose and blue glitter shoes to match to my wedding. Not one person at my wedding had any idea what I wore.

Supacase's avatar

I think the off-white sweater and brown slacks with nice shoes (maybe some earrings or a scarf?) is perfectly fine for an afternoon country club wedding. You could certainly go dressier if you want to, but I don’t think it is necessary.

Supacase's avatar

@chyna OMG! Does she normally dress like that or was she trying to upstage you?

chyna's avatar

She always wore mini skirts, but not the electric blue! Add to that the fact she had the snow white (not blonde) hair. I think she was trying to upstage me and she did. To this day (15 years later) my co-workers tell new employees about it.

DrasticDreamer's avatar

My brown slacks no longer fit. :( Looks like I have to go to the store, otherwise I really have nothing to wear.

gailcalled's avatar

Get black or navy silk slacks….

Amoebic's avatar

cute red shoes with a pair of black slacks and a tailored white shirt (notice her jewelry) is my suggestion, but I don’t know much about the wedding or the bride/groom, so that might not be appropriate?

An outfit made with neutrals (black, white, grey, browns, tans, beiges) can be dressed up with brightly colored accessories (shoes, handbags, scarves, stoles, jewelry). My favorite last-minute dress up tool is the stole. it can hide a less than dressy shirt under a fancier wrap. : )

Dorkgirl's avatar

@charliecompany34 don’t know if you were referring to my comment about “comfort”, but I meant feeling secure in what you are wearing. That is, if you run out and buy something today to wear tomorrow and feel pressured to “look right” you might choose something that you are uncomfortable in.

gailcalled's avatar

@DrasticDreamer : What did you wear, how was the wedding and what did everyone else wear?. More importantly, did you have a nice time?

DrasticDreamer's avatar

I ended up wearing slacks a dressy shirt and a pair of brown heels. The clothing was actually pretty varied, so I shouldn’t have been worrying at all in the first place. I had fun, yeah. That was actually the first wedding I’ve been able to attend.

gailcalled's avatar

@DrasticDreamer: I’m delighted you had a nice time. Remember this the next time you plan to attend an event. It doesn’t matter what you wear as long as you don’t scare the horses or offend the mothers-of-the-bride and groom.

Krag's avatar

Weddings are great just as long as your not the one wearing the tux or the bridal gown . Glad it worked out.Like wakes people don’t dress all up like they use to for weddings.And don’t be me. Don’t wait until the day of something to decide you need something to wear.

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