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scotsbloke's avatar

Have you had a James Blunt "You're Beautiful"-esque missed connection?

Asked by scotsbloke (3751 points ) December 19th, 2009

You know the song, he sees a girl in the subway – their eyes meet, He cant live without her after a few seconds of eye contact.
Well, maybe that’s overly romantic but have you ever had a moment/feeling similar to that?

When I was Single (about 20 years ago) I used to Deejay and on one occasion I was playing the tunes (showing off) etc and a girl asked me to dance. I had a trainee with me so I did dance with her, She was pretty, alluring and we had a 3 minute dance, a slow one, so we had a kind of cuddle too, we chatted, I forget what about, but from that moment I couldn’t get her out of my head. She had the sexiest eyes EVER! I can still see her face now…....I NEVER saw her again and for a while it drove me mad.
I still wonder who she was, where she is, how she is, I wish her love because she gave me something, A longing which while not something I’d want every day, it taught me a valuable lesson in life. For that I thank her. (I think I love her still – isn’t life funny?)
So tell me your story…..........

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23 Answers

sjmc1989's avatar

I had a different interpretation of that song. I thought it was about seeing an ex-lover after you break up and not ever seeing them again. Oh well I’ll tell my story that goes with my interpretation anyway!

It is so weird that you ask this question. Last night I was listening to this song and I haven’t heard it in forever and it reminded me of what happened to me last week. My last boyfriend was the epitome of the perfect man for me, but we are both very guarded and couldn’t put our walls down for fear of getting hurt. Long story short we had a very hard break up after many talks. It was a wrong time, wrong place kind of relationship It has been months and I hadn’t seen him but still thought about him every single day. So last week I about to turn on the freeway and he gets behind me at the light and as I am driving he passes me and we both look at each other. Both of our faces had hurt written all ovet it. We just kept looking at each other until eventually he passed me completely. I started crying immediately because I am so afraid that as time goes on I’m going to forget how green his eyes were, or every detail of his face. I know I will probably never see him again and it makes me sick to my stomach because he was someone I could have seen myself spending the of my life with.

scotsbloke's avatar

@sjmc1989 That’s the great thing about music – Our own interpretation of the message…............could be you are right about the song, I like both interpretations.

I really feel for you, your story, and I hope as the days go by the pain eases, and you keep in your heart the good things about your relationship, and hey, you never know what the future holds.
(I’m hopeless at giving advice / encouragement but you hang in there)

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

With everyone I had those kinds of moments with I have followed up on – I’d never let them go

sjmc1989's avatar

I guess this song would be better suited for my story

Did I disappoint you or let you down?
Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown?
‘Cause I saw the end before we’d begun,
Yes I saw you were blinded and I knew I had won.
So I took what’s mine by eternal right.
Took your soul out into the night.
It may be over but it won’t stop there,
I am here for you if you’d only care.
You touched my heart you touched my soul.
You changed my life and all my goals.
And love is blind and that I knew when,
My heart was blinded by you.
I’ve kissed your lips and held your hand.
Shared your dreams and shared your bed.
I know you well, I know your smell.
I’ve been addicted to you.

Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

I am a dreamer and when i wake,
You can’t break my spirit – it’s my dreams you take.
And as you move on, remember me,
Remember us and all we used to be
I’ve seen you cry, I’ve seen you smile.
I’ve watched you sleeping for a while.
I’d be the father of your child.
I’d spend a lifetime with you.
I know your fears and you know mine.
We’ve had our doubts but now we’re fine,
And I love you, I swear that’s true.
I cannot live without you.

Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

And I still hold your hand in mine.
In mine when I’m asleep.
And I will bare my soul in time,
When I’m kneeling at your feet.
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

I’m so hollow, baby, I’m so hollow.
I’m so, I’m so, I’m so hollow.
I’m so hollow, baby, I’m so hollow.
I’m so, I’m so, I’m so hollow…

DarlingRhadamanthus's avatar

Here’s my story, Scotty…

About 12 years ago, when I was till living in the States, I was exhausted and hoping that no one would take the seat next to me on the plane to London. So, you can imagine, when I caught the site of a pair of boots as I was bent over stuffing my bag under the seat in front of me. I thought, “Oh..now, that’s great…some big galumph is going to sit next to me.” I looked up and found myself staring into the most amazing eyes. I was not expecting that. But more than that, he looked familiar to me. Of course, we had never met (this time around anyway.) He was a British guy who had been over in the States and was on his way home. He had played rugby in the UK and had gone to America to try his hand at US football. (No, he wasn’t famous.)

He took the seat next to me and we fumbled about with seat belts and started laughing as the seats were so cramped. “I guess we are going to get to know each other really well,” he said. And that broke the ice. We started talking. There was this instant and amazing connection. We talked all the way. We looked so much like a couple that the flight attendants were asking us what the other wanted. The most interesting thing was that we ended up talking about soulmates…and it was just a very revealing conversation. The flight was ten hours so we had a lot of time. He told me about his life, and I told him about mine. He was deep and thoughtful and kind. We had a lot of the same interests.

When the cabin lights were turned off, I got up to go to the ladies room. When I returned, in the dim light, I saw that he was gone (he had had the aisle seat). I looked around and then heard a whisper….he had moved over to the window seat and put the armrest up. He signaled to me and opened his arms so that I could curl up and sleep with my head on his chest. And that’s what I did. And he held me in his arms and would kiss the top of my head periodically, ask me if I was comfortable and we fell asleep in those cramped seats. All very sweet (nothing tawdry.) It’s very silly to say this, but I felt so safe in those arms. As if I had just reconnected with someone I knew before.

When we landed, he made sure that my bags were all together and that I knew where I was supposed to go. We exchanged addresses and numbers, but he was leaving rugby and going back to school to get a degree and he was starting in a few days…something that he had postponed for years. I was in England only for ten days at that time. And I called him to ask if he wanted to meet, but he could not get away. I felt slighted thinking that perhaps he just did not want to meet. I felt really rejected….and I realize that was ridiculous…he probably was busy. For years, I thought of him, I had his mailing address and thought of writing to him and never did. I then lost his address. I would look on the internet attempting to find him. I would find articles on his rugby matches, but no sign of him.

When I moved to the UK, years ago, I tried to contact him….I wrote to him in care of his university, but there was no response. My email address (which I included on that letter) had to be changed because the email service was discontinued. So, if he tried to write, I never would have received it. I still thought of him and then I put it to the back of my mind.

Last week….on a whim…after searching on the two major social sites to no avail…for a long time….I found him. There was his picture. And my heart skipped a beat.

I have not yet contacted him.
That’s how vulnerable I still feel.

So, there’s my very long-winded answer to your question….Scotty.

sjmc1989's avatar

@DarlingRhadamanthus I loved that story and I hope you find him. Lurve and Luck for you! :)

sevenfourteen's avatar

I seriously don’t mean to squash this question because I do feel I’ve had a slightly similar experience but I heard the song was about an ex he saw on the train with another man, not a random girl. I do enjoy reading about these encounters though

scotsbloke's avatar

@sevenfourteen and @sjmc1989 – I think you are right, it seems it was his ex girlfriend he saw. here’s what Wikipedia says about the song:
Wikki link
to be honest, either way works for me. I fond is so romantic to think that we can have such strong feelings for people we dont even know – and miss people like craaaazy whom we know it doesnt work with.
@DarlingRhadamanthus – Thank you so much for sharing that story with us. Long-winded answers are definately my favourite kind and I truly hope you can re-connect on some level with him, If that’s what you truly want.
Take care folks
BB

scotsbloke's avatar

@sevenfourteen – I appreciate your response, dont feel like you’ve “squashed”! the question, only helped to confirm it’s origin, and if you’d like to share your experience….............:0)

sharing this stuff can make us feel quite vulnerable, especially if we are open on here about who we are, I realise that.

sevenfourteen's avatar

@scotsbloke – being vulnerable is one of my biggest fears. But that is why I enjoy fluther, it lets me be slightly vulnerable but stay annonymous.

I definitely take it for the ex point of view. My freshman year of college I started hanging out with a guy a year older than me. We were both busy people and decided it was just best to stay monogomous but not actually dating. Well as time progressed (and lots of things went down between us) I eventually fell for him but because I was too afraid of being vulnerable and putting myself out there to take the relationship further (because our original agreement didn’t have to be permenant) it backfired and he thought I was heartless and then turned it into a nightmare for us both. Long story short I ruined it by failing to confess my feelings before it was too late. We barely talk now, and he acts very awkward around me. A few months ago I had a few reoccuring dreams about him and the emotions within the dream were so real that when I woke up it made me feel so… uncomfortable because in the dreams we were happy and things worked out but actual life didn’t work out like this. I am happy now, and it’s best that we went our seperate ways but the dreams made me feel like I was missing something. Almost like a glipse of what it would have been if I had made different choices. Even thinking about it now I have to remind myself of all the bad things that happened or else I feel a longing for him. I suppose though this is what makes us human. And perhaps @sjmc1989 is right- goodbye my lover is possibly better for this situation. Either way both are tied to strong emotion and truth

scotsbloke's avatar

These sorts of experiences make us who we are and as long as we continue take positivity from them we should be ok….. Thanks for sharing your story.

sevenfourteen's avatar

I definitely learned a lot fro this experience about who I am and what I want/need. I suppose it came at a good time too, I met him about a month after I went away to college.

sjmc1989's avatar

This is such a sad thread for me. :( We need someone to come in here and write an inspiring response about how she/he met a guy/girl fell in love never saw him/her again and then they saw each other years later, and Happily Ever After! Is that so much to ask??!! :)

scotsbloke's avatar

@sjmc1989 that would be inspiring!
And I’m sure it happens.

sjmc1989's avatar

Actually its kind of how my parents met, but not to that extent. My mom worked sterilizing instruments at a hospital my dad worked there too. They bumped into each other one day literally and my mom made him drop his papers. They just smiled at each other and nothing more. She didn’t see him anymore, but one day she was driving and saw him at a gas station and she pulled over to talk to him. They dated 8 months, got married, and 31 years later they are still together.

sevenfourteen's avatar

Well then there you go, a happy ending :)

But a) I don’t think happy endings are what life is about, and that’s what makes it interesting and worth living, and b) that’s also probably not what this song is about either…. Try asking a question about the song “I’ll look after you” by the Fray. I heard it was about the guy who broke up with his gf, realized he could never be w/o her and then married her. How sweet is that… I’m waiting for that experience

DarlingRhadamanthus's avatar

I just think how life is perhaps like the movie, “Sliding Doors”......what if? :)

sjmc1989's avatar

Update: Guy from my story found me on facebook and sent me a message. Which said he missed me, hoped I was doing well and asked for me to give him my number again becuase he had to get another phone and lost all his numbers.

scotsbloke's avatar

Wow, How amazing is that? I hope it works out for you – and that you (at the very least) become great friends…....
BB

sjmc1989's avatar

Another Update: Guy from my story called me yesterday, we talked for a long time and then I saw him last night. We had a amazing night he just played guitar all night, and we talked. He said sorry for what had happened, he just had stupid doubts. We have decided to be friends and then play it by ear.

scotsbloke's avatar

Woo Hoo. That’s brilliant. Re-affirms my faith in romance / love / friendship. Thanks for the update.

sjmc1989's avatar

Never would have thought it would happen, it re-affirms all of those thing to me too. Your very welcome for the update and thank you for asking this question!

lucifer's avatar

Mine’s a little different :)

It had been 4 months since my gf and I had broken up. I was going through the “empty-shell-floating-through-life-listlessly” phase and she was on the rebound.

On a whim, just before my semester exams, I sent her a Season’s Greetings forward (we lived in different cities cause of college – it was the distance that had led to the break up). I got a reply instantly, wishing me the same. One thing led to another and we were messaging each other. Mind you, this was one day before my hardest paper *shudder, I still remember, it was thermo T_T * Suddenly, she was like “Can you talk for a bit?” and I was like “Yeah, sure.” I called and said hey, and immediately, she burst out crying. She cried about how much she missed me and how foolish it was for us to have broken up. I was kinda stunned that she felt the same way I did. I slowly managed to pacify her and we talked and we talked all night long *racked up a wicked bill and didn’t know jack shit for the next day’s exam *. I found out that her rebound guy was a complete prick and I’m ashamed to admit that I was so happy when I heard this. I asked her to come back to me and she agreed immediately (after breaking up with said prick). We’ve been together ever since and its already been 3 years.

Jame Blunt’s You’re Beautiful and a couple of other “I’m-missing-you-so-much” romantic songs. If it weren’t for them, I wouldn’t be with the woman of my dreams, so yeah, that’s my story :)

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