Social Question

Mat74UK's avatar

Are you one that dares to speak out about things that you don't agree with?

Asked by Mat74UK (4646 points ) January 9th, 2010

Or would you rather turn the other cheek?
Does it depend on the topic?
Does it depend on whether you think you’ll be out numbered?
Does it depend on the situation?
Or are you that hot headed you’ll just say whatever the bloody hell you like!

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47 Answers

Russell_D_SpacePoet's avatar

I will always speak out against things I disagree with. I try to be tactful, but that is not always possible.

dpworkin's avatar

I have a well deserved reputation on Fluther for being a poster boy for restraint and politesse.

gailcalled's avatar

I neither turn the other cheek, become hot-headed, or consider myself daring. They are qualities that have nothing to do with discussing a topic or having a point of view.

(Exceptions; Capitalizing Common Nouns; use of punctuation as design!!!!!!!!!!!!!!, not knowing what a sentence is when to stop it and why runon sentences are hard to understand breathing hard now and getting red in the face.)

john65pennington's avatar

If i am right, i will stand my ground till hell freezes over. my dad taught me this at a very early age. people may not like it, but they will have respect for you after its all over.

wonderingwhy's avatar

I’ll pretty much try to keep the peace. But if someone is using my lack of argument to further their own position or takes it to mean I agree I won’t hesitate to correct them, tactfully or otherwise.

I think a lot of it for me comes down to is it worth my energy to argue the point and what will the consequences be if I don’t with topic and being out numbered have nothing to do with it.

daemonelson's avatar

I tend to mention it if I strongly disagree.

scotsbloke's avatar

If it affects me or those close to me I’ll stand my ground.
If it is about me and I over hear it and dont like it – I’ll say something.
One thing age has given me is a firmer backbone, somethings I may have let slide in the past – I wont now, but I do agree with @wonderingwhy about the effort involved for the outcome…..

marinelife's avatar

I speak out against things that I think are wrong.

laureth's avatar

I go through phases of both. Sometimes, I see something wrong and I just cannot remain silent (yet try to disagree using reason and fact, not heat and anger). Then, other days, the struggle seems too much, the ignorance too pervasive or too entrenched to effectively combat, and the stoopid wins.

Silhouette's avatar

I speak out against injustice whenever and wherever I see it. I’m not exactly a hot head but I’m stubborn like a mule.

CyanoticWasp's avatar

I try to choose my battles. And then I fight them to the end.

mattbrowne's avatar

@Marina – Ditto.

I focus on the subject not the person. An evolution denier for example can be a very nice and gentle person.

gailcalled's avatar

^^Ooh, subtle but nasty.

stranger_in_a_strange_land's avatar

On certain issues I am outspoken and stubborn, but I always strive for politeness. I frequently get into debates on “hot button” topics when I know from the very beginning that there is very little chance of changing the other persons views. All I hope for is to match them point-by-point for the sake of the audience and have it end with us pleasantly (I hope) agreeing to disagree.

jamielynn2328's avatar

I have no filter when it comes to opening my mouth sometimes. This is something I am currently working on at work. Sometimes I just need to shut up and do my work. But I love debate. I love to express my opinion and I shall die doing so.

borderline_blonde's avatar

I’ll share my opinion, but I won’t argue the issue, primarily because I don’t think that arguing is an effective form of communication.

LeopardGecko's avatar

I always speak out if it’s necessary.

Yetanotheruser's avatar

For me it depends several things: how strongly I feel about the situation, how comfortable I feel in the setting, and how well I know the person to whom I am speaking out.

NaturalMineralWater's avatar

I say whatever the bloody hell i like.. but for the most part I say it tactfully. XD

dutchbrossis's avatar

I generally try to speak out about what my opinion is when I disagree. Most of the time though people get really mad at me because I am very strong and opinionated. I also don’t agree with a lot of what society says.

gailcalled's avatar

I waited until now to point out that it’s “Are you one who dares to speak out about things that you don’t agree with?”

philosopher's avatar

I only fight for things worth fighting for .
I customarily laugh at delusional people.
Science is fact and can be proven (documented).
I will put all people who attempt to BS me in their place. This includes incompetent Teachers, Psychologist and Social Workers.
I respect people’s right to believe in their religion. If they preach against research. I will tell them to their faces they have no right to speak for the Lord. I pray they learn in the like Nancy Regan did .That is poetic justice.

Siren's avatar

Good question! On this site and in person, I generally speak my mind. It may not be what others want to read, but it’s my opinion (and why I like fluthering). I’m kind of honest that way, if it’s any consolation. In person, I’m pretty much the same, although obviously the arena is different and in certain situations it’s best not to speak :)

AnnieB's avatar

I depend on the topic, and who is in disagreement of it….

I state my opinion, listen to others, and most times just leave it alone…

rooeytoo's avatar

I read what others have written (and marvel at how much bs is contained in some), offer my opinion, whether it agrees with the multitudes or not. Then move on. Often however the self proclaimed experts on all things will take umbrage at the disagreement and ever so kindly point out what an idiot I am. For which I am eternally grateful and move on again, hehehe. Some people are control freaks who are not content until you see it their way.

Keeps life interesting.

nikipedia's avatar

I often do, but it depends on the context.

When I was teaching a course that involved a lot of TAs last quarter, I got a reputation as a pain in the ass because I often insisted we do things that were a lot more work on our part, but only marginally more fair/helpful to the students. But I thought it was important that we do everything we can to teach the students well and fairly, even if it was more work.

But other times I keep my mouth shut. There’s one instance in particular that I’m thinking of, and I’m still not sure I did the right thing. I was sitting in a coffee shop working, and a group of astrologers were having a meeting/discussion. One man stated (for the entire coffee shop to hear) that people who were abused were getting retribution for something they had done in a past life.

I was deeply offended by the implication that every victim deserves what happens to them. But I wasn’t part of the group, and the guy was a total stranger, so I kept my mouth shut. On the one hand, I was impressed that I was able to restrain myself—something it has taken 25 years to learn how to do—but on the other, I wish I woulda let him have it.

PS: Hi Gail!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I love exclamation marks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

syz's avatar

I’m going to waffle here and say that it depends on the topic, the situation, and the individual. I’m known for being outspoken, and I don’t tolerate stupidity very well, but I try not to be obnoxious. And I prefer not to bang my head against (metaphorical) brick walls.

Ron_C's avatar

I speak out about things with I agree and disagree if the statements move me. I tend to ignore the “politically correct” because they are boring. I am drawn to answer the wise and the completely foolish. The past decade has been a wellspring of foolishness which I could not ignore.

There were so many really stupid statements from Bill Clinton’s affairs, to the worst government the U.S. have ever seen. I find that I cannot keep silent.

dpworkin's avatar

Today it seems I have become even more docile than usual.

Ron_C's avatar

@pdworkin that is too bad. We need more people that speak out for rights and justice. I never want to be part of an easily lead herd.

Ron_C's avatar

@pdworkin sorry that you feel that way, enjoy chewing your cud.

tinyfaery's avatar

Me? No, never. Ask anybody here.

Mat74UK's avatar

@gailcalled – I’ll turn the other cheek to that one!

Dr_Lawrence's avatar

I will always speak out against things that hurt, abuse, exploit or mislead others.

There are many things with which I don’t agree that do none of those. I will offer my view, where appropriate as an alternative view but with deference to the rights of others.

I try to be diplomatic, at least at first, even though honey is expensive and I am not seeking to catch bees. Where diplomacy fails and others are at risk, I will resort to vigorous and sustained outspokenness and action.

YARNLADY's avatar

Yes, I’m not afraid to share my knowledge and opinions.

philosopher's avatar

If you live in a democracy it is your right to express what you believe is right.
Attention everyone speak up for yourself and those who can not. Some people would love to take this right away. Will you stand up against those who would try? Hitler gained power because people did not.
In Iran students have been killed for speaking up. This right is precious. Please exercise it.

Merriment's avatar

I do speak out against things I don’t agree with. To do otherwise would be to give tacit approval to the wrong.

I also turn the other cheek when I feel a wrong has been done to me through another other person’s ignorance or on a subject that matters little to me.

It doesn’t so much depend on the topic as it does the importance. In other words, will someone be harmed by my silence? Will someone benefit from my speaking?

I rarely stop to consider the odds for me or against me if I feel it’s the right thing to do.

Even in the heat of battle I rarely just say whatever the bloody hell I like. I’m a bit more deliberate in my manner and usually choose my words with some thought.

Of course all this flies out the window when someone flips me off in traffic…............:P

Blondesjon's avatar

On occasion . . .

wundayatta's avatar

I listen first. Or I try to. Even to things that are heinous. I try to understand how the other person got to this impossible-to-understand position. Then I try to ask questions that show that person the inconsistencies with their underlying principles.

I don’t think you can argue with a true believer who believes something that is so wrong you can’t believe it. I mean, you can argue, but it doesn’t help. The only way to get anywhere is to try to understand the history and personal experiences leading to this opinion or understanding of the world. If you can find any point where you both want the same thing, you’ve got a starting point. The rest is negotiation.

mattbrowne's avatar

Civilized disagreement is the fuel of progress

philosopher's avatar

Yes Matt I agree .
Lurve for you .

dpworkin's avatar

except when one party is in a pissy mood, matt

janbb's avatar

I feel like I used up a lot of my outrage and outspokeness during the Bush years, and my political passion is still alive but quiescent. I will speak truth to power when I witness injustice – or at least I hope so – but I tend not to engage in battles with idiots who won’t change.

mattbrowne's avatar

@pdworkin – hope your mood has improved – seen my pm ?

dpworkin's avatar

Oh, I don’t know. I may have accidentally revealed a feeling or two in a couple of posts this morning.

mattbrowne's avatar

And your latest thoughts about the inner workings of evolution? I mean you dared to speak out against me in the other thread. Which is great of course. I like debates. I like people who question me, who challenge me. But then I was a bit puzzled. It’s no big deal, but I think @gailcalled was really interested to get to the bottom of the issue.

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