General Question

Hollister0221's avatar

Why are divorces today over 50 percent?

Asked by Hollister0221 (502points) June 3rd, 2008 from iPhone

are we more selfish than our past generations?

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6 Answers

DeezerQueue's avatar

I think there are a lot of factors that are involved, but one of them is self-gratification. I think we often take the easy way out, or try to skirt things, trying to be happy all the time, believing that life is about being happy all the time or that our lives should be perfect. It isn’t and they aren’t.

Because divorce doesn’t bear the social stigma it once did (even 40 years ago) we assume that makes it somehow better for us because there is no longer that stigma.

With all that people are facing, particularly the youth, I think marriage at a younger age now isn’t always a good thing, either.

Women strive to have education and careers and although they’ve come a long way (baby), there is still often inequity in the home, which places unnecessary strain on a marriage.

I think there are a myriad of reasons that divorce is at such a high rate, I know others will also offer up good answers and look forward to hearing their reasoning as well.

jlm11f's avatar

i think deezer nailed it. marriages are a commitment. you have to WORK for it like any other relationship. people who go into marriage thinking of it being a bed of roses and all fun are in for a grave disappointment. people aren’t willing to listen and to compromise, most have grown up never having to compromise and always getting their way. i don’t believe in marrying young either. And i would never even consider marrying someone until i have known them for at least a year. People think they are in love and that’s all that matters. But before marrying, they forget to discuss important things such as their core beliefs (religious etc), how they want their kids raised (whether they want kids or not), etc. Generally speaking, if you want to know what kind of person you are marrying, spend some time with their parents. The relationship between the parents (positive/negative) will often be a good indicator of your marriage relationship with that person. This of course only applies to people who have grown up getting along with their parents and family. I think my point is, physical attraction isn’t everything, if you disagree on core beliefs, you will have a harder time retaining your marriage (not impossible, just harder time).

Personally I don’t believe in divorce (for myself), unless there is some form of abuse involved. But this is because I know that I would never get married to someone if we didn’t agree on a more intellectual level.

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cheebdragon's avatar

I dont think its ever been 50%, I think the highest its ever been is only 42%

nocountry2's avatar

The social stigma preventing men from being willing to go to therapy.

DeezerQueue's avatar

@PnL Even in abusive relationships people can separate and give the other the chance to work on their issues. But part of that also becomes problematic as nocountry2 states.

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