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Broken_EarthAngel's avatar

Female Jellies What goes through your mind when you see your bf throw a tantrum?

Asked by Broken_EarthAngel (771points) November 25th, 2014

Having a fit like a child over minor things.

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12 Answers

Foie_Gras's avatar

Ugh, I hate when he acts like that. Such fowl behavior.

To answer the question: I wonder if his parents raised him in a somewhat spoiled manner.

Aethelwine's avatar

I wouldn’t be with someone who throws tantrums.

Haleth's avatar

This is why I don’t have boyfriends anymore.

Snarky answers aside, I’ve been there so many times. People talk about the three strikes and you’re out rule. When it comes to dating guys (based on anecdotes from my own experience and my friends), it’s so many more than three strikes. It’s like, you forgive the person again and again when they do stuff like this, as your respect for them is gradually eroded. Then one day there’s a moment of clarity, where you realize this person is not going to change their behavior, with or without your help, any time soon. What they need is more maturity. Best case scenario, they will get there after years of life experience, but it may never happen. It’s finally time to move on.

That’s reading a lot into an open-ended question, but that’s basically what goes through my mind now. There is a guy I really respect, and he put it this way. “The world doesn’t make them [young men] grow up anymore.”

DrasticDreamer's avatar

It’s hard to know how to answer without knowing what your definition of a tantrum is, but I agree with @jonsblond and @Haleth. If, after communicating why the behavior is immature and destructive, it doesn’t change, you just don’t date them.

Earthbound_Misfit's avatar

You proceed with caution. My ex used to throw tantrums. I didn’t notice I was doing it for quite a while, but I modified what I did and avoided certain things to prevent the tantrums. In the beginning it was tiny things, but in the end, I didn’t feel I was being myself anymore.

So, if this is common behaviour, as has been said, consider whether this is a relationship you want to be in.

jca's avatar

I wouldn’t be with someone who behaved like that, especially since you say it’s over minor things. I don’t have the time or the energy to deal with placating someone’s need for attention and drama. Honestly, after about the second time of that crap, I’d be done with him.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

I would advise you not to stay with a guy like that. If he blows a gasket at minor things what is he going to be like if the shit hits the fan and you really need him? Ask yourself that question.

dappled_leaves's avatar

An adult who throws temper tantrums is not going to grow out of that behaviour, and I’m not interested in being a parent to a significant other. Seeing that happen once would be the end of the relationship.

Mariah's avatar

My boyfriend doesn’t throw tantrums but my best friend does. Pisses me right the fuck off because it ruins the mood in our apartment and it’s usually about something incredibly stupid (the most frequent cause is losing a game).

My choice of way to handle it might not be the best, but my personal rule is that I do not indulge. I never apologize for beating him at a game. I never imply that his behavior is in any way warranted. In fact I usually make my annoyance apparent and refuse to engage him until he calms down.

It’s just stupid.

LornaLove's avatar

I’d be very nervous around such a person and probably call it quits. I know people close to me like this and I avoid them.

cheebdragon's avatar

Confirmation that he’s lying about something.

trailsillustrated's avatar

Ugh I hate temper displays of any kind. I have been married to men like this, will have nothing more to do with it than to shove them into the next oncoming tram. Run, don’t walk.

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