Social Question

SergeantQueen's avatar

How does one acquire a sugar daddy?

Asked by SergeantQueen (11751points) May 1st, 2017

How would one go about the process of acquiring a sugar daddy? Asking for a friend.

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46 Answers

Espiritus_Corvus's avatar

Oh, god. She’s getting herself into a life of dependency upon men who really don’t give a shit about her.

It’s probably one of the easiest things a young woman can do. First, she needs to lose any shyness she might have toward men, improve her sex skills to a very high level, then take one vacay to the Caribbean, hang out in places where wealthy international yachtsman hang out, be charming, and within a very short time she’ll get what she’s after. Overtime, she will be passed from one friend to another until she loses her looks. Then she will find herself in bitter world with no skills and a life of poverty. That’s how most of them end up.

It’s much, much better to go to school first and get a skill that she can fall back on if things get rough.

janbb's avatar

Not a good idea from an emotional point of view.

Espiritus_Corvus's avatar

^^Roger that. These women are usually absolute messes after awhile and because they’re so crazy, they are forced into early retirement—abandoned in some dive far away from home.

Darth_Algar's avatar

1: Find rich guy at bar.
2: Suck dick.
3: Profit.

cazzie's avatar

Not a long term plan. My brother in law was so fed up with his youngest daughter’s suger daddy antics he went around telling people he didn’t know what she was going to do when her looks went.

ucme's avatar

Simulate sex with a gingerbread man?

Dutchess_III's avatar

Find a rich man. Have sex with him. Have a lot of sex. Even when you don’t want to have sex, you have to fake it and pretend it’s the best sex ever. Do whatever he wants in bed. Never turn him down even if you’re puking sick with a fever. Don’t expect him to introduce you to his friends or family (after all you ARE a whore and he isn’t.) Make all the surgical changes to your body that he asks you to, because he’s paying for it. Stay as pretty as you can for as long as you can. Always tell him how smart he is. He is always right, because he is smarter than you. Try to save up the money he gives you against that day you’re no longer young and pretty. Be prepared for him to dump you after that.

Long story short: Be Melania.

MrGrimm888's avatar

Yeah. Hang out where rich guys are. The rest should write itself.

One of the islands that I work on has a constant flow of those types of girls. It’s common to see a 22 year old girl, with a man in his 50’s-60’s… They stay at his place, until he tires of them,then they move to a few of the other locals. Then,after a few weeks, or months, I never see them again.

It’s actually pretty sad. I knew a nice girl who just started working at a bar there. She was 21, petite, very nice. She eventually was with a couple of 50something year old guys. I haven’t seen her now in several months. She was so sweet, and pretty. After I saw her with those guys, I found her repulsive. She used to hit on me a bit, and I always thought she was too skinny, but I might go out with her because she was so nice. She can forget that now, yuck…

I understand why girls do it. But it is something that I find disgusting, and I am sad for them, more than anything else.

I even see plenty of former trophy girls/wives. They are especially tragic. Once their looks left them, they were thrown out, like an old lawn mower… And they have little chance finding a good man, because they look like an old plastic surgery practice doll. Most turn to prostitution. But with even older, much poorer men. I would wager most of them regret their lives…

ragingloli's avatar

Also, make sure it is an old rich guy.
Not only are they more desperate, they are also likely to die soon, leaving you, if you play your cards right, with a big inheritance.

Espiritus_Corvus's avatar

^^Yeah, like that happens aaaalll the time. Pipe dream.

The only guy I knew of that actually successfully left any wealth at all to his lover, a local islander who posed as this British Lord’s chaufeur/valet for over twenty years, but then had to spend the next twenty and half the fortune fighting off the good lord’s heirs.

Baron Glenconner left local Colin Tennant the the Caribbean island of Mystique and all the improvements and industries there upon plus a trust fund to keep it all going for awhile. Tennant kept a house for himself, then signed it all over to the island’s residents as a cooperative, then pretty much bowed out. It’s a sweet story, in my book, but an extremely rare one.

If this ever happens, the concubine can expect a battle royale with heirs coming out of the cracks—heirs much wealthier and powerful than they.

canidmajor's avatar

While I actually agree with the philosophies above, we know nothing of @SergeantQueen‘s friend’s circumstances. Maybe she’s smart enough to enjoy the pecuniary benefits, AND amass enough valuable property to set herself up nicely after a spell with a wealthy man.
We don’t know if she’s in dire straits now and plans to parlay this relationship into investments and/or an education.
And however one may feel about Melania Trump @Dutchess_III, I think it’s unlikely that you can speak to her motives and intimate life, and she is, after all, FLOTUS.

janbb's avatar

@canidmajor She’s asking for a friend.

canidmajor's avatar

Just edited that.

MrGrimm888's avatar

I think it’s just a piss poor idea. Under any circumstances…

Not too smart,or ethical to be a sugar daddy either…

MrGrimm888's avatar

There’s a term we have for women who are with men for cocaine. We call them “snow hoes,” or refer to them as having a “white leash.” There are worse nicknames….

IMO. These girls are no different, and the sugar daddies, aren’t any better than the guy with the drugs really.

cinnamonk's avatar

So why is everybody jumping to the conclusion that @SergeantQueen has real intentions of acquiring a sugar daddy?

canidmajor's avatar

And why are we assuming this would be a long-term relationship? Maybe this friend is just looking for some short term lucrative employment?

Espiritus_Corvus's avatar

@cinnamonk Nobody here is jumping to any conclusions about @SergeantQueen. Unlike you, they read the question’s details.

It is only natural for people to warn to the kind of life this can lead to. These women are everywhere in every resort in the Caribbean. A few do this for awhile, but many more get hooked into the life and it isn’t pretty. i’ve had them on my boat with their daddy’s. I’ve talked to these women. I’ve talked to the ones who’ve left the life. It’s really not a very satisfying lifestyle for them. They’re in it for the money and have a hard time getting out of it.

I don’t think people here are making moral judgements on this subject. I think they are detailing the impracticality and sadness that goes with a life of dependency on people who wish long term intimate relationships without intimacy—people who are often cruel and dangerous from what I’ve seen.

Dutchess_III's avatar

I was watching The Lincoln Lawyer last night. Part of the story revolved around a call girl who was murdered. They put this stupidly macho guy on the stand and asked if he’d had sex with her on that night. He puffed up his chest and said, “Oh yeah! Everything you can think of!”
The next question was, “Was she planning to go out again that night, or receive another visitor?”
“Oh no,” the guy boasted. “She was exhausted. By that I mean she was satisfied!
Idiot. She was just doing her job. For all you know she was bored out of her mind the whole time.

flutherother's avatar

First, she must lose her self respect.

Dutchess_III's avatar

Not necessarily @flutherother. It’s just a job, like any other job. Easier than some.

cinnamonk's avatar

@Espiritus_Corvus “Unlike you, they read the question’s details.”

Yeah, the question details were brief enough that I read them thanks. I don’t get why everyone is acting like she’s in real danger of debasing herself here.

chyna's avatar

@cinnamonk I don’t think you did read the details. It’s not for @SergeantQueen, it’s for her friend.

cinnamonk's avatar

Yes, I know.

Dutchess_III's avatar

scratching my head, confused now

cinnamonk's avatar

Me too. Darnit, I didn’t mean to throw off the discussion.

MrGrimm888's avatar

@Espiritus_Corvus . Summed it up.
We aren’t trying to call the OP, or her friend out, and be mean. We’re making declarative statements, on social.

If this were on general, I would just have opined on the best way to get a sugar daddy.

Being on social ,I added my 2 cents. Which may be worth less, but it is what it is…

MrGrimm888's avatar

It’s not like I’m discouraging someone from telling their friend to go to college….

Patty_Melt's avatar

I am friends with a coin dealer. He offered to hook me up with a rich old man who kept buying lots of gold from him. I turned down the opportunity.
Man, a bag of gold is freakin’ HEAVY!

Dutchess_III's avatar

I turned down a lot of opportunities!

Patty_Melt's avatar

Holding a bag of gold puts things in perspective.

MollyMcGuire's avatar

Hang out where old men hang out… course, marinas, and every neighborhood has a morning paper/coffee loving gathering of gentlemen. Be sure and tell your friend.

Dutchess_III's avatar

So what if it IS for her, @MollyMcGuire ? Do you see a problem with it? Lots of women do it.

SergeantQueen's avatar

I don’t want a sugar daddy

Dutchess_III's avatar

I believe you. I wouldn’t really care, though. I just don’t like the insinuations that are being thrown around, like it’s something shameful. And worse, it’s the women doing it.

SergeantQueen's avatar

Men can be with women just for money.
As long as both people consent and are okay with it, it isn’t shameful. It is their choice.

Dutchess_III's avatar

I didn’t slut shame her. I answered the question. It was a playbook. You read something into it that was not there. When I said the word “whore,” the implication was that he will not regard himself as a whore but he is, but he will regard her as a whore. And he will. So he won’t introduce her to family. So you have to be ready for that.

Dutchess_III's avatar

Society generally says that being a whore is bad, if you’re a woman. I don’t think it is, as long as a woman is doing it of her own free will. What amazes me is that some men will pay money just for sex!

I know of a young lady, late thirties and now early 40s, who is single, has 3 kids, and has no problem sleeping with men to get help around the house. We were discussing this candidly in front of her father. I said, “So you just slept with him until the kitchen floor was done?”
She said, “Yep!”
I just shrugged. “Why not?” I said. “Win win on both sides.”
Dad was super uncomfortable. I thought it was odd that she even brought it up in front of him.
Then she “dated” a plumber for a while.
Why not? If she’s comfortable with her self doing that, why not?
But if a sugar daddy sees her as a whore, he will try to keep her hidden because of his shame in her.

Patty_Melt's avatar

That’s not a sugar daddy, that’s a john. A sugar daddy is wealthy, and covers her expenses, either she lives with him or he gets her a nice apartment. He is an older man, and shows her off like his new toy. If he is married, then she is a secret in his home circle, but they vacation together.
The term sugar daddy points out that he is older, hence, the daddy part. He lavishes her with goodies, that accounts for the sugar part.
She is his toy, not a partner with any real input in his life. Sometimes a sugar daddy will marry his toy, but she is still not included in decisions, etc., and kids are out. She is there to see to his whims.

jca's avatar

@Patty_Melt described it accurately. The friend should be prepared to be sexy, dress in a sexy manner, coiffed, nails done, etc. In return she’ll be taken to nice restaurants, given nice things including cash. In exchange for all this she’ll give up years of her life where she might be in a relationship that’s more meaningful.

Dutchess_III's avatar

I know all of that you guys. That’s why I said he would never introduce her to anyone important. I never said that the girl I mentioned she had a sugar daddy. I was just making an example of trading sex for work.

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