How do you prevent this situation from becoming more socially awkward?
Asked by
jlm11f (
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February 1st, 2009
My mother did this at a party once. We still make fun of her for it, and were remembering the incident today. She asked one of the ladies there, “Oh when are you expecting?” The lady, who was very not pregnant apparently looked at her and said “What?” in an annoyed tone. And luckily I got to witness the whole thing :).
My question is, if you had committed this faux pas, how would you have responded to the not pregnant lady to help reduce the akwardness of the situation?
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17 Answers
“I’m sorry. You just have such a beautiful glow about you!”
That must have been mortifying…and hilarious!
“Sorry, I didn’t realize that you were just incredibly fat.”
I was the victim of that question one time and it really didn’t bother me. I was wearing a summer dress that was loose and carrying a few extra pounds after having given birth to twins previously.
The person felt awful after saying it but what can either of you do once the words are spoken….
Life is too short to sweat stuff like that. Just move on.
That’s why the rule is you don’t congratulate or ask about a pregnancy until the woman in question tells you to your face. Even if you’re in the delivery room. Shut your face.
If someone violated the rule, I’d follow up with what Aug said. :)
Someone asked my mother that about me when I was fifteen. Within earshot. Asshole.
this happened to me recently at the super market. I know I don’t look pregnant so I was very confused, then insanly embarrassed an then extremely amused. The woman was mortified. I’ve decided to bring it up often.
At my 5th High School Reunion (15 years ago) -
Unsuspecting Carl Smith* asked former crush Michelle Jones* to dance.
While on the dance floor, Carl decides to lean down a bit, place his hand on Michelle’s belly and begin to RUB! in circles
“So”, he says, “When’s the baby due?”
“baby – Baby – BABY!” Yells Michelle in increasing volume (well over the volume of the music).
Everyone in the room stopped. Needless to say, it didn’t end well.
I never went to a reunion again and, I suspect, neither did Carl.
*last names have been changed to protect the stupid and outraged
I’d say “Why not? Don’t you have sex? When was the last time you had sex? And I mean intercourse with a man? You DON’T have sex, do you?! HEY EVERYBODY!! THIS LADY NEVER GETS ANY!!! I could help you out! I have BIG FEET!! Do you want me to have sex with you??”.
@Mr_M LOLFR – Jesus Christ, I’m tearing up here. That was funny.
“Big Feet” he says. GA my friend.
That situation is pretty socially awkward to begin with. I’m not sure if there’s any real recovering from that, except to learn to never say such a thing again. If I were in such a situation (which I will never be in, guaranteed) I would apologize and leave the conversation. Getting it started with a backhand insult like that is just a bit too much to try to recover from in my opinion.
Here’s how it could get worse:
Instead of being at a party, you’re at work, the woman in question is a class-mate you haven’t seen in a couple of years and at first you think she’s just put on a lot of weight, until she mentions ‘the little one’ and you then ask when it’s due…....................to which she responds “he’s actually 5 months old now”
…..as mentioned, you’re at work so you can’t just do the “oh, is that the time…” trick!
Yes, this happened to me!
Apologize quickly, briefly and sincerely. Then offer to buy her a new car, or at least lunch for the rest of the week. At a good restaurant.
@wildflower – I actually think a situation like that might have been easier. I would have said something like, “Oh, I didn’t realize you already had a baby. When you mentioned your ‘little one’, I was really surprised and figured you must be very early into your pregnancy since you aren’t showing at all!”
I hope I never have to try that line, though, lol.
@amanderveen considering she was easily 3–4 sizes bigger than last time we met, that would’ve been hard to pull off, but if I remember rightly, I attempted something like that and then changed the subject (the details are a bit hazy as I was mortified and busy looking around for a hole in the ground to crawl in to).
This happened at my work. A guy asked one of the girls when she was due. When she replied “I’m not” he just stood there and stared at her. I asked him about it later and he said he was trying to come up with something to say and couldn’t. Too bad you guys weren’t there to whisper some of these great answers in his ear.
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