Social Question

alive's avatar

What is it with men not having good customer service skills?

Asked by alive (2933points) May 14th, 2010

I am a server at a restaurant. I am a women. I smile and talk to people in a friendly voice. I have noticed that men don’t seem to do this. They do the bare minimum. Speak in monotone, don’t smile, etc. There are a few exceptions – for example men that work in big chain restaurants have better customer service skills ( Humorous Example ) – I would assume that these big chains have more extensive training and higher expectations than smaller, less established businesses.

Does anybody else notice this? Is it just me, or do men not have good customer service skills, in general? Why is that?

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14 Answers

jazmina88's avatar

I think women could get better tips by being outgoing and friendly.
Men dont do that as well, as servers, but men probably do more of the tipping.

The best waiter I’ve seen was at Red Lobster. He blew my mind.

Customer service on the phone is a different art, and not to be forgotten.

perspicacious's avatar

Some of the best customer reps are men, in my experience.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

What is it? Your assumption that it’s gender-related.

NeroCorvo's avatar

I have waited tables and worked with all different genders. Honestly- shitty service comes from both genders. It seems like more women are in service roles though which could give the impression that they are better at it.

FutureMemory's avatar

Society expects women to be more pleasant and accommodating.

talljasperman's avatar

some men find customer service demeaning

meagan's avatar

I’ve worked with a lot of amazing men with great customer service skills.
Don’t throw tomatoes at me, but I’ve worked as a telemarketer before. And the men were amazing. If someone said no, I’d let them go. But I worked with a man that made an amazing salary off of commission. He was an absolute pro (even though he worked a crappy job). But he was a very kind, understanding person, and could sweet talk his way into any kind of sale.
I think you’ve just experienced a bad group. Everyone is different. Some men are terrible. Others aren’t! The ones you are working with just don’t know what theyre doing. If they expect to make any kind of money, they need to learn how to treat others. You’ll catch more flies with honey than vinegar :)

jerv's avatar

For much the same reason that you don’t see too many female mathematicians. Like it or not, there are neurological differences between the genders. Women really are more social than men. You like to interact with people while a lot of us guys don’t.

Also note that Autism, an impairment of social and communication skills, is at least four times more prevalent in men than in women, and that’s just the cases severe enough to be medically noteworthy; it doesn’t count those that are merely not naturally inclined to socialize due to personality. I don’t know if it’s an actual cause, but I have a hard time thinking it’s a total coincidence.

That said, while you are correct that men have inferior customer service skills on average, I have to say that the best customer service experiences I’ve ever had all involved male C/S reps. It’s not that guys can’t excel in this area, it’s just that most are inferior to women.

MissA's avatar

Mostly in life, you get back what you toss out.

MacBean's avatar

I haven’t experienced this at all. All the truly bad service I can recall getting has been from snotty teenage girls. AGEISM!

downtide's avatar

The customer service (complaints) department in the company where I work, employs mostly men. I don’t think this would be the case if men had such poor customer service skills. It’s just an individual thing. There are good and bad in both genders.

alive's avatar

for those of you that disagree (of course you are entitled, because this is a pretty subjective topic anyway), but i am coming from the stand point of someone who is a server. So i tend to notice this a lot more when i go out to eat (or shop etc). i mean it is the same for anyone in their respective field. when you do something everyday you tend to be more in tune and notice differences more than the average customer. i wouldn’t say that men are “bad” per se, i am just saying they don’t seem especially friendly, bubbly, smiley… and as a woman, those are things that i understand to be important in the ‘customer service’ realm, as well as when i am a customer.

i also have noticed that sometimes when men are serving men customers they do it “good ol’ boys” style, i.e. “how’s it goin bro, can i get you a beer”

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

@alive You’re just noticing gender norms. They’re all around us, it’s perfectly ‘normal’.

Neizvestnaya's avatar

In restaurants I worked in when younger then only the men who were good with customers were kept on and it’s been the same as I’ve gone into sales, mediocre efforts don’t stick it.

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