Is it possible, (if so, how?) to stop self-destructive behavour in another?
Someone close to, and loved by, you insists on behaving in ways that either damages them directly (note: this is not related to alcoholism, nor drug abuse), say, by constantly forgetting to take safety precautions or leaving a dangerous mess; or they know certain behaviours upset you and somehow they continue with them.
An example here is offering directly to do a favour, knowing the action is of great importance, then doing a bodged job (and the job itself cannot be corrected, without starting again), putting a whole project in jeopardy. You thought they had the skills and the will to do that job properly, and trusted them.
The feeling is of being goaded into anger, of being mistrusted by return, of constantly trying to help them to get something right (co-dependency understood in this situation) and of having one’s own actions, situation and intent undermined.
Do you have experience of this kind of relationship? It is utterly frustrating, how could one deal with it?
I appreciate the generosity of Fluther-spirit here guys, so your stories and suggestions will be read and responded to, thanks.