Social Question

poisonedantidote's avatar

Is she interested in me?

Asked by poisonedantidote (21544 points ) July 2nd, 2011

FML, I’m about to ask a does she like me question on fluther, what is the world coming to.

I’m 28, she is 25, I have known her for years and years, and have always enjoyed spending time with her, but I was never really interested in her in that way.

There was a time when she and I would spend a few hours a day together along with a mob of about 5 to 20 other friends, but otherwise only speak to each other from time to time and in passing.

Tonight I went out for a walk and bumped in to her in town, I said hi and so did she, it looked like we were on our way, but I stopped, turned round and called out to her to hold up a moment. I went up to her and asked her if she knew where I could get some weed (we used to smoke together) and off we went to get some.

Long story short… we arrive back at a place where we used to smoke together in the woods, we sit down on rocks and start to get stoned. She then asks “So, what are you doing these days, you have a girlfriend?” I respond no, she goes on to talk about how she has been single for 6 months now.

She continued talking, but by this time I was already looking in to the distance, half listening, with a grin on my face, wondering what she meant to tell me.

She asked me what was I grinning at, so I told her “Nothing, for a moment there I thought you were trying to tell me something” She then proceeded to act surprised and deny it.

We spent a few hours in the woods getting stoned, looking at the stars and talking, we had a great time, and I have plans with her to meet tomorrow after work.

What are my odds of making a fool out of my self tomorrow by finding out the hard way I’m only in the friend zone, and that she was just curious about me being in a relationship or not.

(I would assume from her POV that if I’m alone with her in the woods at night getting high, that I don’t have a SO, maybe better to give the benefit of the doubt on that one)

EDIT: shit this thing is long, i’ve got it bad don’t I

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9 Answers

Imadethisupwithnoforethought's avatar

poisonedantidote don’t panic and don’t psych yourself out. Women tend to like confidence. Assume she likes you. Assume she likes you even if she tries to put you in the friend zone. DON’T REACT. And don’t worry all night and be all nervous tomorrow. That is what will kill your chances.

If she is trying to size you up as date material, you need to act like you have it together, and not like you care all that much. You like her, she is awesome. It will not kill you if she doesn’t fall for you. That is the attitude you need to have or you will mess up your own chances.

poisonedantidote's avatar

@Imadethisupwithnoforethought Thanks, thats all good advice, but i’m more than anything looking to get an estimate, or odds on where I stand, kind of like intelligence.

The moment I suspected she was saying what I thought she was, I asked her about it directly, confidence is not really the problem. lol… wtf, is there even a problem?

What I’m trying to get at, is I’m going to bring the topic up tomorrow, I know what to do and what not, I’m just curious as to my chances of success, so that I can deploy pre emptive face savers, and so I don’t go too wild (or not wild enough).

I dunno lol, im a tard.

Imadethisupwithnoforethought's avatar

Man I hope it works out for you. Good luck

JilltheTooth's avatar

So you are going to ask her outright tomorrow? May I suggest you don’t put her on the spot like that, maybe mention that you are interested and go from there. If you really like this woman, don’t make her uncomfortable. Put your own pride on the line, don’t ask her to maybe lose face…
Good luck!

poisonedantidote's avatar

@JilltheTooth Thanks, yes very sound advice, I was planning to tell her how beautyful I think she is, and mention that I would not be opposed to experimenting with a date.

I have a fair level of confidence with her, I could put her on the spot, we could have a good laugh about it, and still have a good time that night. All im really risking is making a fool of my self, and lets face it, i do that often enough to not have to worry.

I guess my largest concern, is i say too much, and she talks, and i get annoying questions from friends and co workers etc.

JilltheTooth's avatar

Ah, but @poisonedantidote , there’s the kicker. Once it’s out there, it’s out there, and we gotta take the lumps with the rubs. I guess I shouldn’t talk as I quit smoking and haven’t told those people who would make the annoying remarks. But I’m great at handing out advice! If you want to be with this woman, nothing ventured nothing gained and all those other annoying cliches…

LuckyGuy's avatar

Isn’t it magical?
Enjoy. You’ve got the perfect setting.

ucme's avatar

If only people could cut right through the bullshit & just come out & say “wanna fuck?”
Would make these awkward moments much easier ;¬}

augustlan's avatar

I’d say your odds are pretty decent. Go for it, and let us know how it goes!

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