Social Question

syz's avatar

What will it take to get me out of this slump?

Asked by syz (33057 points ) 3 weeks ago

I’m in a slump. Maybe even depressed. During my free time, I sleep or read or work in my yard – all isolated, solitary. I plan to exercise, and I roll over and go back to sleep. I keep telling myself that I need to get out there, so I buy tickets to events…sometimes I go, sometimes I don’t.

So I have a 3 day weekend (gasp!). There’s a motorcycle rally that I could go to on Saturday if I can just get up the energy to get up.

There’s a food truck rodeo on Monday (I’ve been interested in going for ages).

Motivate me! Make me go! (Come pick me up?)

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21 Answers

Coloma's avatar

Mmmm….I think it is more important to learn to enjoy your solitude and be comfortable with yourself. Being always on the go and social is over rated IMO.
Go only if you really WANT to, otherwise, look at this time as a time to get to know yourself better, enjoy some solitary pursuits and know that shift happens. Maybe what you need most is rest and relaxation.

Our society is all about staying compulsively busy as if it is some sort of virtue. It is not.
I went through a lengthy phase of enjoying my solitude some years ago, it was chicken soup for the soul.

CWOTUS's avatar

I’m in the same boat.

I am NOT depressed, NOT ‘at-risk’, NOT going to harm myself or anyone else (I’m keeping a list, though, just in case), NOT in any way ‘critical’, ‘clinical’ or ‘emergency’ ... but my former zest for life has turned into a low-grade blah. I haven’t even sailed for a couple of years now!

Fortunately I do have an activity planned for the next few days (and it involves family and sailing, so that’s all good), but if hadn’t been for someone else initiating that… I’d be at home, alone, and more or less counting the minutes until I could sleep again or get back to work on Tuesday.

PS: I think you missed the food truck rodeo. The link says that it was an Independence Day event. Maybe you could offer to work for the people who maintain the site; it took far too long to confirm that, yes, this is Durham, NC. That kind of information should be much more prominent. NC deserves better.

canidmajor's avatar

I’ll pick you up for the food truck rodeo. I loves me some food truck!

@Coloma: I see nothing in the question or the details to indicate that @syz has any problem with solitude or has a compulsive need to stay busy, just that she is dealing with some sort of malaise and wants to be jump started out of it. @syz , maybe you can clear this up for us?

I looked at the relevant link for the 2014 weekend, I would pitch my tent there for the entire time!

LuckyGuy's avatar

Hey! Is anyone here up for a meetup with @syz in the Durham NC area?

PM @syz today!

If a couple of you decide to go I will give you coordinates for a nearby geocache you can find.

Coloma's avatar

@canidmajor Just my possible take/ 2 cents worth. Whenever we are faced with change from our normal routines such as @syz resigning from her job, a certain amount of stress related issues can crop up. Malaise, modest depression, etc. I am just a firm believer in learning to enjoy our own company and simply mentioning that the programming to stay busy is a big obstacle for many to overcome when faced with certain changes.
Sometimes the issue is not about staying involved, sometimes it is about learning to rest within ourselves.

Tropical_Willie's avatar

I’d go to the Food Truck Rodeo, but go and practice tomorrow at Fullsteam, they’re having a fourth anniversary party. Please wear white, it is the last weekend before “can’t wear white shoes ! !” Here’s the lowdown!

syz's avatar

Huh, woops, looks like that’s a link for last Labor Day on the food truck rodeo.

I have no trouble being by myself, I’m an anti-social loner anyway ;) But I think @CWOTUS nailed it, I’m just BLAH.

rojo's avatar

It’s a FOOD TRUCK RODEO!!!

A FOOD!!.......TRUCK!..........RODEO!!

A

FOOD!

TRUCK!

RODAYO!

Three outstanding reasons to go!

The sky is awake so YOU need to be awake and hustling!

Says the guy who just wants to lie down and nap for a while!

tinyfaery's avatar

From one anti-social loner to another:

Take a vacation. It doesn’t have to be that long. 4 or 5 days. Go somewhere that is completely outside of your norm. You’ll be able to look at your life from a distance and perhaps find out why you are in this funk. And you’ll find new things to do or think about while you are away.

I usually just go to Disneyland when I’m in a funk, more so than usual.

Dutchess_III's avatar

Sometimes you just have to take that first step, and it becomes easier than you thought it would. Take a walk around the block, see how that makes you feel.

Also, do you feel better after working, like in your yard?

As for the motorcycle rally….just go. Don’t think about whether you want to or not, just do it.

Please stay in touch with us.

LornaLove's avatar

I hear you. I am going through the same thing. So, hopefully I am now motivating us both.

First of all recognise you are depressed (or not). Then, don’t be so hard on yourself. Perhaps this ‘roll over and sleep’ period is just what you need, within reason.

Exercise does not spell ‘gym shoes, running, treadmills and change rooms’. Which, really, no one feels like doing even when they are well.

Instead, think about what you like doing. Love even. Do you like to cycle? Hire a bike! Do you like rowing? boating, fishing, bird watching, collecting strange pebbles, walking along remote countryside? Then do that.

Also I have found, if you have the right clothes to do your chosen exercise you are more likely to do it.

Ask a friend to walk with you in the evening or morning. I do better in the evening. Explain that you might say no some nights, as your motivation is low. Both of you can commit to motivating each other.

Caring about others also helps. Join a charity or support group that you have an interest in. Perhaps you love making model planes, or baking cakes? Then offer to show a group of kids how to do that. You get the idea.

Once again though if you do feel like rolling over and sleeping, do that to. Remind yourself that NOT all days are THAT bad and take advantage of the good ones.

There I helped us both!! (Maybe!).

KNOWITALL's avatar

CAn you ask a friend or group to go? Sometimes being accountable to others is a big motivator.

LuckyGuy's avatar

OK I have a small challenge for you. The FT Rodeo will be in the parking lot south fo the baseball field.
After you eat something see if you can get to that field. On the east edge of the park, to the right of the wall in deep center field, look for a small capsule in plain sight. It looks like this . Unscrew the top and take out the little scroll. Look at the list of names. The last person signed it in late April. Tell me their name and why they might be related to me. :-)

syz's avatar

^ Wow, seriously? Cool!

Sadly, I have to work tomorrow after all – but hope to get out early.

Dutchess_III's avatar

Oh goody! A mystery! A Fluther mystery!!!

Haleth's avatar

When this sort of thing happens in general, I think you can ease yourself back into it with low-stakes activities. It’s hard to motivate yourself to do big things when you have a case of the blahs. But it’s easy to do something like take a long walk by yourself, or have a cup of coffee with a friend/ neighbor/ acquaintance.

Maybe getting out of the blahs is like exercising a muscle. If you start with little things, you can gradually raise your activity level. Then you can ease yourself back into a full and exciting life.

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

OK, here is what you are going to do, you are going to get your lazy butt (said in a nice way with all love), and go to THAT MOTORCYCLE RALLY. You are going with a purpose; you are going to meet and get the email info of three other people. You are also going to make a bet with yourself for the event, if you see X amount of vintage Indians, Triumphs, BMWs, etc. you get to splurge and buy something nice you can barely afford, or take a trip you should not, but want to take. You will take photos, some of which you will post to your favorite social media or online photo share site. Then you will fashion some questions for us here based off what you gleaned from the event. You have work to do, get busy, (I and everyone else is waiting). Stay safe and have fun at the rally, < shaking fist in menacing fashion > or else.

rojo's avatar

In the immortal words of the students at More Science High:

“P – E – P – Pep pills! Pep pills! Pep pills! Pep pills! Pep pills!”

LuckyGuy's avatar

Of course. I wouldn’t kid you. iDon’t worry about not making it on Saturday. It will be there for a long while. (It was placed there in October of last year.).
According to the link you posted the FTR is on the 31st, Sunday.

If you have a GPS, I’ll give you the exact coordinates. Borrow one from someone if you don’t. It is in plain sight but is still a 3 for terrain. It might be hard to reach. ;-)

If this is far for you or inconvenient there are plenty of others that are easier and might be within walking distance of where you are right now.
Cue the Twilight Zone music. :-)

Dutchess_III's avatar

Doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo.
Done been cued.
Come to Kansas and plant something @LuckyGuy!

Inspired_2write's avatar

Everday ( present) offers one a chance to engage in activities etc and once that day is finished it becomes history.( past)
Don’t let regrets become your daily mantra.
Even if one goes to an activity it does not mean that one has to stay for the whole event…in short one has choices .
write a diary of your days..when you notice boring entries then its an incentative to go out and enjoy life more often.

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