General Question

KalWest's avatar

Do you, or anyone you know, have same sex parents?

Asked by KalWest (1389 points ) April 16th, 2009

If so, have you, (or they) had any adverse experiences?

Observing members: 0 Composing members: 0

13 Answers

aviona's avatar

Oh I know plenty! Only saw positive things.

I babysat for for a little boy with two daddies for years. Of course it gets a little confusing saying “daddy” and “daddy,” so one day when he was still a toddler Daddy #1 called something into the other room to Daddy #2 and referred to him as “honey,” just as a pet name. And for some reason, on that particular day it stuck with the little boy I babysat for. So from that day on they were known as Daddy and Honey, to differentiate.

Of course I may know so many same-sex parents and only know of positive experiences because I am from a northern California, which is very liberal and then I am from an even more liberal county and an even more liberal section of that county…it’s like a left-wing bubble here.

KalWest's avatar

@aviona
I’m in SoCal. I like NoCal better ;-)

RedPowerLady's avatar

A good friend of mine has three moms. There were two but then they separated and one got “re-married”. Her dad is also gay but I don’t think she sees him very often.

She is a fantastic person. Very intelligent and very well-rounded emotionally. She is also empathetic and has shown herself to be an effective leader. No adverse effects that I can see at all. In fact she loves and adores her family. She is also able to make jokes about her situation which shows how comfortable she is with it.

Editing to add: She (me too) also lives in a very liberal city.

figbash's avatar

I have two male, partnered friends who were able to adopt a daughter. They prepared for the worst, knowing it was going to be challenging and they’re both amazing parents. Their daughter is now a brilliant, mature, open-minded, well-adjusted ‘tween who also has other friends with same-sex parents.

There have been a few bumps, but in this instance, far less adverse experiences than many “traditional” families may experience.

Trustinglife's avatar

My former best friend grew up with two moms. (One had been married to a man and had kids before coming out.) He grew up with some shame about bringing people home from school with him, but I can’t think of any other adverse effects.

I also lived with two gay men, one of whom is a very close friend. One had a daughter from when he was married to a woman. No ill effects there, either, from what I’ve seen. The daughter is delightful, and both dads are good parents and love her completely. What more could you ask for?

La_chica_gomela's avatar

I had a friend I haven’t seen in a while who’s dad “married” a man after he and my friend’s mom got divorced. So she doesn’t really have two “dads” she has a dad and a step-dad. The only “adverse effects” I really perceived are the same, I think, as they would be for anyone who’s parents are divorced. She often felt like she didn’t really fit in at her (straight) mom’s house OR at her dad’s house. They each had their own lives, and she never really felt ‘settled” in either of them. So, I got the feeling she felt lonely because of her home situation.

She turned out great. She was an awesome friend, a great listener, a very caring and compassionate person, and an academically gifted student.

oratio's avatar

These are all great stories. Very interesting to read.

Leanne1986's avatar

A friend of mine’s mother is now in a long term relationship with another woman since splitting up with the father. My friend is a wonderful, positive girl and I, personally, haven’t seen any negatives come from the sitution and myfriend is very open and happy to talk about it and from what she has said I don’t think she feels that there has ever been any problem with the situation. Her mum is happy so she is happy.

gailcalled's avatar

I have a female friend who has a partner. They both got impregnated (several years apart) with the same man’s sperm from a bank and have two daughters who are, thus, half sisters. Everyone seems very happy.

wundayatta's avatar

There is a gay couple in my neighborhood. Their son is in my daughter’s class. The couple are very outgoing and volunteer for civic projects, and seem to know everyone. Their son is not a favorite of my daughter. From what I gather, he is kind of aggressive and defensive in school. There may be some teasing involved. This is at a very progressive school. They are working hard on building diversity, and in reigning the kids’ most anti-social tendencies in. I think it’s not always so easy to have two Dads.

filmfann's avatar

A bisexual friend of mine found herself pregnant, and gave the baby to adoption by a pair of lesbians.
That couple soon split, and they shared custody of the child.
Those two then found new life-partners.
My friend also has remained in occasional contact with the child.
I say if this child, who would now be about 24 years old, isn’t screwed up since he has 5 mothers and no father, there is no reason why anyone should object to gays adopting.

hungryhungryhortence's avatar

I grew up with lesbian neighbors, one of the women had been married then divorced and her two girls lived with them. The girls were like any one of the rest of us though the two women parents were abusive to each other. They grew up to have families of their own and from all outward appearances and hearsay, they are fine.

tiffyandthewall's avatar

i know a boy with ‘2 mothers’. i don’t know him very well, but i don’t think he’s had any major problems because of it, and he’s okay with it.

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