Is it wrong for me to plan for the "What if's" in life?
I’ll be getting married in a few months. As of right now, I’m happy with my partner. I look forward to married life with him. I used to think that marriage is forever, no matter what. I thought that once I got married, I was in that marriage for life. No divorce for me. But lately I’ve been having different feelings about this topic. I’m realizing that life doesn’t always work out the way you think/hope it will. No matter how much I want to be only married to this one person for the rest of my life, it may not work out that way.
Ever since my new way of thinking, I’ve started to try and get my own individual life. I’ve been getting together with my friends more often, venturing out into the world on my own, even applying for jobs. I feel like if my husband and I ever got divorced (which isn’t very far fetched according to statistics), I don’t want to be that woman that is completely lost without her other half. As of right now, I’m completely dependant on him. I go where he goes, eat what he eats, thinks what he thinks, etc. I want to be my own person now. I’m planning for the what if’s, which I think is a smart move on my part. However, he sees this new independence thing as a threat. He’s worried that getting my own life will hurt out relationship. I’m not sure how to convince him that this is actually a good thing, and that he should do the same. How do you feel about being an independent woman/man? Is it the smart path to take? Or should I be more focused on making my marriage last until death do us part?
This question is in the General Section. Responses must be helpful and on-topic.