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Soubresaut's avatar

Can you help me with a friend?

Asked by Soubresaut (13714points) November 3rd, 2010

There’s a girl at my dance studio (and school too) I’m getting worried about. She’s been moody in a quiet restrained way for a couple years, that if you’re not looking for it you can miss it really easy. She’s also been really quiet.
This summer she was supposed to go to a dance camp but I happen to know that she didn’t really, and took the summer “off” and stayed at home. She came back and had gotten way out of shape, and noticeably larger (she was only out for a little over a month…)
She loves dance, but she hasn’t been coming to classes, calling in sick. But when I see her she doesn’t seem sick…? She’s also not been coming school—again, sick.
When she is at either, while she’s talking more she seems worse to me somehow.
She’s not turning in assignments at school, and she’s dancing with very little energy.
She’s very closed off so it’s really hard to talk to her… so I thought I’d see if any of you have any idea? I know I haven’t given you so much to go on but I thought I’d try?

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6 Answers

skfinkel's avatar

What age is she and you?

Soubresaut's avatar

Seniors in high school (yes emotional/confusing time I know)

Blueroses's avatar

Is there a shared interest or class that you could use as an excuse to ask for her help?
She might resent or rebuff a direct approach to asking her what’s wrong, but if you set her up in the helper role first, maybe she would be more open about herself.

lemming's avatar

Just keep trying to talk to her and be her friend. You can’t do more than that.

Judi's avatar

Was she very very thin before? My gut instinct, from what you have said is that she has an eating disorder, and the other idea that surfaced to my consciousness was that she could be a victim of sexual abuse. A lot of sex abuse victims gain wait to hide in their fat and be less attractive to their abusers.
Absolutely nothing but a “feeling” from your words to back this up, so take it with a grain of salt.

Judi's avatar

On my iPhone and can’t change wait to weight. Sorry!

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