Social Question

troubleinharlem's avatar

Want to play the "If celebrity x were y, then he/she would be z" game, part 2?

Asked by troubleinharlem (7978points) April 23rd, 2011

It sounds way more complicated than it really is.

Here’s an example.

So, if (celebrity) Tom Hanks (x) was a piece of wood (y), he would be Tom Planks (y).

Get it? You can use any celeb that you want!
Catch: the names have to rhyme!
Oh, and the person who posts has to finish with a name and the person below them makes up a post about the celebrity.

I’ll start with one: If Tom Cruise was beat up by a gang, then he’d be Tom Bruise.
(Bill Clinton.)

And then the next person would say, “If Bill Clinton smoked marijuana, he’d be Chill Clinton.”

this is because @queenie requested this thread again, and because the other one kind of died after 300 some replies.

Observing members: 0 Composing members: 0

76 Answers

MilkyWay's avatar

@troubleinharlem Thank you ^_^
Prince Harry

troubleinharlem's avatar

If Prince Harry were a monster, he’d be Prince Scary.
John Cleese.

Brian1946's avatar

If John Cleese were a dairy product, he’d be John Cheese.

Harrison Ford.

naivete's avatar

If Harrison Ford was a car company, he’d still be Harrison Ford.

Michael Moore.

Brian1946's avatar

If Michael Moore turned tricks, he’d be Michael Whore.

MilkyWay's avatar

If @Brian1946 bought an ice cream, he’d be Brian40licks
Toby Mcguire

Brian1946's avatar

If he were really hot, he’d be Toby McFire.

Jeri Ryan.

Kardamom's avatar

If Jerri Ryan were really a Borg named 7 of 9, she’d leave 9 of 10 men swoonin’ and cryin’.

Alan Rickman.

MilkyWay's avatar

If Alan Rickman got ill, he’d be Alan Sickman
Kevin Costner

Brian1946's avatar

If Kevin Costner was bought by a store chain, he’d have to change his name to Kevin Costco.

Jason Alexander.

MilkyWay's avatar

If Jason Alexander got kicked down some stairs and broke his leg, he’d be known as Jason Goosygoosygander
Sean Connery

Kayak8's avatar

If Sean Connery did more with the Bond girls than is rumored, he’d be known as Sean Gonorrhea. (I know, it’s a stretch).

Martin Luther King

Brian1946's avatar

I MLK started the Police instead of Gordon Sumner, then he’d be Martin Luther Sting.

Johnny Depp.

optimisticpessimist's avatar

I @Brian1946 were ill he would be @Brian194sick

Jennifer Garner

MilkyWay's avatar

If Jennifer Garner was a farmer, she’d be known as Jennifer Barner
Denzel Washington

Brian1946's avatar

If Denzel Washington married the brother of Emilio Estevez, he’d become Denzel WaSHEENton.

Jaleel White

MilkyWay's avatar

If Jaleel White got Knighted by the Queen, he’d be Jaleel Knight
Willem Dafoe

Brian1946's avatar

If Willem Dafoe turned tricks with Michael Moore, he’d be Willem da ho.

Susan Sarandon.

MilkyWay's avatar

If Susan Sarandon dumped her partner, se’d be known as Susan Abandon.
Harrison Ford

Brian1946's avatar

If Harrison Ford watched American Idol, he’d become Harrison Bored.

Boris Karloff.

Ladymia69's avatar

If Boris Karloff’s DNA were dug up and mixed with that of the Lorisidae, he would be
Loris Karloff.

That would be some serious Frankenstein shit.

Lady Gaga

naivete's avatar

If Lady Gaga was an epic story, she’d be Lady Saga.

Seelix's avatar

@naivete – What’s the next one?

Kayak8's avatar

If Ms. Seelix were half of an odd couple, then she’d be Ms. Felix.

Abraham Lincoln

linguaphile's avatar

If Honest Abe Lincoln was a gesture, he’d beckon, I reckon…
Tim Robbins

yankeetooter's avatar

If Tim Robbins was very sad, he’d be Tim Sobbin’s
Fran Drescher

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

If Fran Drescher was a maid to a rich woman she would be Fran Dresser.
Wesley Snipes

yankeetooter's avatar

If Wesley Snipes were a plumber, he’d be Wesley Pipes.
Babe Ruth

Kayak8's avatar

If Babe Ruth were a dentist, he’d be Babe Tooth OR
If Babe Ruth were a fortune teller, he’d be Babe Sooth OR
If Babe Ruth were a presidential assassin, he’d be Babe Booth OR
If Babe Ruth had great manners, he’d be Babe Couth er

Ben Stiller

yankeetooter's avatar

overachiever! lol!
If Ben Stiller were a murderer, he’d be Ben Killer.
If Ben Stiller were a dentist, he’d be Ben Driller OR Ben Filler.

Reba McIntyre (sp?)

Kayak8's avatar

If Reba McIntyre (sp?) were to burn twice, she’d be Reba BackonFire

Walt Whitman

yankeetooter's avatar

If Walt Whitman kept hitting the net while playing tennis, he’d be Fault Whitman.
Edgar Allan Poe

Brian1946's avatar

If Edgar Allan Poe sold his body for laughs, he’d be Edgar Allen Hoho Ho

Leonard Nimoy.

Kayak8's avatar

If Leonard Nimoy wore camo paint, he’d be Leonard Decoy . . .

[Since we were having a typing war: If Edgar Allen Poe were to experience tumescence, he’d be Edgar Allen Grow!]

Emma Thompson

Brian1946's avatar

If Emma Thompson was an elephant who was angry at her male kid, she’d be Emma Stomps-Son.

Vinnie Price.

naivete's avatar

If Vinnie Price was a hotdog, he’d? be Weinie Price.

Leonardo DiCaprio

Kayak8's avatar

If Leonardo faced the death penalty, he’d be Leonardo Decapitate.

Jennifer Lopez

chocolatechip's avatar

If Jennifer Lopez was kinky, she’d be Jennifer Sanchez.

yankeetooter's avatar

Don’t look away from @chocolatechip…I think they may be one of those weeping angels from Doctor Who…Nobody blink!

AmWiser's avatar

If @chocolatechip melted, she’d be chocolatedip.
Barbara Streisand

Kayak8's avatar

If Barbra Streisand lived on the great plains, she’d be Barbra Bison. (This activity certainly offers clues to how we each pronounce different words because Streisand and Bison totally rhyme when I say them!)

John Lennon

Seelix's avatar

If John Lennon were in a deodorant ad, he’d be John Mennen.

Bruce Willis

Kayak8's avatar

If Bruce Willis were an asexual, spore-forming mold, he’d be Bruce Aspergillis.

And, in honor of the Royal Wedding:

William Wales

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

Since the Royals are so good at slinging the bull William Wales is William Sales

AmWiser's avatar

If @Hypocrisy_Central were a folk singer, he’d be Hypocrisy Minstrel.
Humphrey Bogart.

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

If Hunphrey Bogart ate too many beans he would be Humphrey Go Fart, and if he was a naturalist he would be Humphrey Yogurt.

Roman Polański

Kayak8's avatar

If Roman Polanski wrote like a Polish Nicholas Sparks, he’d be Poland Romanski . . .

Nicholas Sparks

AmWiser's avatar

If Nicholas Sparks was a Black person who refused to give up his seat on a bus to a White person, he’d be known as Nicholas Parks.

Rosa Parks

Kayak8's avatar

If Rosa Parks worked for the DEA, she’d be Rosa Narcs.

James Taylor

Brian1946's avatar

If James Taylor married Norman Mailer, he’d be James Taylor-Mailer.

Colin Clive.

Kayak8's avatar

If Colin Clive were a Dutch beekeeper, he would be Holland Hive (keeping the alliteration).

Sonny Bono

linguaphile's avatar

If Sonny Bono tripped while holding a platter of alcoholic beverages, and spilled it on his favorite waitress, “Sunny” he would yell,“Sunny! Oh No!”

Cher

Tropical_Willie's avatar

Cher topless would be “Pair”

Dr. Seuss.

Kayak8's avatar

If Dr. Suess were a woman, he’d be Mother Goose.

John Belushi

Brian1946's avatar

If John Belushi kept a pile of leaky pens on his bed, he’d be John Bluesheets.

Cary Grant.

yankeetooter's avatar

If Cary Grant had a defeatist attitude all of the time, he’d be Cary Can’t.
Fred Astaire

Brian1946's avatar

If Fred Astaire got a sex and species change, he’d be Fred The Mare.

Dick Van Dyke.

yankeetooter's avatar

If Dick Van Dyke rides a cycle all the time, he’d be Dick Van Bike.
Julie Andrews

MilkyWay's avatar

If Julie Andrews became an alcoholic, she’d be Julie Anbooze.
Daniel Craig

yankeetooter's avatar

If Daniel Craig was never specific, he’d be Daniel Vague.
Thomas Jefferson

MilkyWay's avatar

If Thomas Jefferson took up shooting as a hobby, he’d be known as Thomas Jeffergun.
Tom Hardy

AmWiser's avatar

If Tom Hardy was consistently late, he’d be Tom Tardy.
Hayley Kiyoko

MilkyWay's avatar

If Hayley Kiyoko wore a Japanese robe, she’d be Hayley Minoko.
Prince Harry

Seelix's avatar

If Prince Harry were four inches tall and lived in a garden, he’d be Prince Fairy.

Lynda Carter

Kayak8's avatar

If Lynda Carter were getting married, she’d be Lynda Garter . . .

Hugh Laurie

linguaphile's avatar

If Hugh Laurie was a fast, sexy car, he’d be a Ferrari….

Robert Sean Leonard

Seelix's avatar

If Robert Sean Leonard had had a dance-pop single released in October 1999, he’d be Robert Shake-Your-Bon-Bon Leonard.

Hank Williams

erichw1504's avatar

If Hank Williams drove a tracked, armoured fighting vehicle designed for front-line combat which combines operational mobility, tactical offensive, and defensive capabilities, he’d be called Tank Williams.

Casey Abrams

yankeetooter's avatar

If Casey Abrams were a doily, he’d be Lacey Abrams.
Sammy Sosa

erichw1504's avatar

If Sammy Sosa liked to play game shows, he’d be called Whammy Sosa.

Mark McGuire

yankeetooter's avatar

If Mark McGuire were worse than his bite, he’d be Bark McGuire.
Eddie Murray

erichw1504's avatar

If Eddie Murray was celebrating, he’d be called Eddie Hooray.

Dwayne Johnson

yankeetooter's avatar

If Dwayne Johnson was a plumber, he’d be Drain Johnson.
Rick Dempsey

erichw1504's avatar

If Rick Dempsey was a complete jerk off, he’d be called Dick Dempsey.

Dirk Diggler

yankeetooter's avatar

If Dirk Diggler were an MAC computer, he’d be Kirk Diggler.
Jean Luc Picard

erichw1504's avatar

If Jean Luc Picard liked using his tongue during foreplay, he’d be called Jean Luc Lickhard.

Tim Burton

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