How can you tell you LOVE someone versus IN LOVE?

For me, it’s always made clear by time apart from that person. If I can forget about them and let my dick guide me into chasing others, then it’s probably just hormonal/lust. If I consistently feel an unwavering voice in my head and heart that tells me, “don’t do it,” then I know at least part of me is in love.

I don’t see a difference between being in love with someone and loving someone.

I think @Kokoro was speaking about the difference between puppy hormonal lustful love vs actual love.

You love your puppy, you love your things, you love your parents and maybe siblings or friend, but when you are in love its a combination of brain chemistry, meets lust and love. Its more of an addictive feeling at first and then with time you find you can better control the addictive nature of it a bit better but you still want to hold on fast. Like breathing. You need it every day but it doesn’t feel addictive. And yet when you hold your breath for too long you desire to breath wins because you need it to survive.

Being in love is all those cazy wonderful things that @Pandora mentions.. But love for someone means you put their needs above your own wants.

Love is what keeps you involved even when things are tough. And the two states are not exclusive of each other. I am as in love with my girlfriend as I was when I fell for her 5 years ago. And I love her very much and help her meet her needs.

For me, the difference between being in love with someone and loving them becomes very obvious after the break up. Once you are in love with someone, you will always love them. A little piece of your heart stays with them. You might get over your romantic feelings, but you always care about them.

But to answer your question, in love is romantic, love can be romantic or platonic.

For me, In-Love comes with sexual attraction and Love is void of sexual attraction. There may be sexual appreciation/admiration but not the kind of chemistry to go, there first person.